如何扛住90秒情绪浪潮【TED演讲】
共 3 集
剧集目录
| 集 | 标题 | 时长 |
|---|---|---|
| P1 | 如何扛住90秒情绪浪潮【TED演讲】 中英双语 | 14:59 |
| P2 | 如何扛住90秒情绪浪潮【TED演讲】 英文字幕(注释+中文外 | 14:59 |
| P3 | 如何扛住90秒情绪浪潮【TED演讲】 无字幕(中英外挂) | 14:59 |
P1 · 如何扛住90秒情绪浪潮【TED演讲】 p01 中英双语 (P1)
字幕摘录
| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 0:01 | I'm 19 years old. | 年十九岁. |
| 0:06 | I'm a camp counselor at a northern Minnesota summer camp, | 我是明尼苏达州北部夏令营的营房顾问 |
| 0:10 | and I'm on a hayride. | 我在干草坪上 |
| 0:13 | It's a beautiful night, | 这是一个美丽的夜晚, |
| 0:16 | and I'm listening in to the conversation next to me, | 我在听旁边的谈话 |
| 0:19 | trying to figure out how to break in, | 试图找出如何闯入, |
| 0:22 | keeping kind to myself, | 对我好 |
| 0:24 | not sure where it was going, how I could break in. | 不知道它要去哪里,我怎么会闯进来。 |
| 0:29 | And just as we're about to turn into the girls' camp from the boys' camp, | 就像我们即将变成 女孩的营地 从男孩的营地, |
| 0:33 | which is where we were headed, | 这就是我们要去的地方 |
展开字幕全文（226 条）
| 序号 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | I'm 19 years old. | 年十九岁. |
| 2 | I'm a camp counselor at a northern Minnesota summer camp, | 我是明尼苏达州北部夏令营的营房顾问 |
| 3 | and I'm on a hayride. | 我在干草坪上 |
| 4 | It's a beautiful night, | 这是一个美丽的夜晚, |
| 5 | and I'm listening in to the conversation next to me, | 我在听旁边的谈话 |
| 6 | trying to figure out how to break in, | 试图找出如何闯入, |
| 7 | keeping kind to myself, | 对我好 |
| 8 | not sure where it was going, how I could break in. | 不知道它要去哪里,我怎么会闯进来。 |
| 9 | And just as we're about to turn into the girls' camp from the boys' camp, | 就像我们即将变成 女孩的营地 从男孩的营地, |
| 10 | which is where we were headed, | 这就是我们要去的地方 |
| 11 | one of the counselors turns to me, looks at me, | 其中一个顾问转过来 看着我 |
| 12 | elbows me in the ribs and says, | 肘着我的肋骨说, |
| 13 | Hey, Joan, you know what? | 嘿,琼,你知道吗? |
| 14 | You're boring. | 你真无聊 |
| 15 | Whoa. | 珃 |
| 16 | Boring? | 无聊? |
| 17 | What? | 你说什么? |
| 18 | I felt like she took a fork, | 我觉得她拿走了叉子 |
| 19 | stabbed it in my gut and just spun it around. | 刺进我的肠胃,然后转过来 |
| 20 | Now, most of us have our own versions of those gut punch moments. | 现在,我们大多数人都有我们自己的版本 那些直觉的冲动时刻。 |
| 21 | I'm not sure what it is for you, | 我不知道这是给你的 |
| 22 | but that was a big moment for me. | 但对我来说这是一个重大的时刻。 |
| 23 | And that moment, | 而那一刻, |
| 24 | and a few other key life experiences, | 和其他一些重要的人生经历, |
| 25 | really sparked my interest to become a psychologist | 真正激发了我成为心理学家的兴趣 |
| 26 | and to understand what it was | 并了解这是什么 |
| 27 | that really helped someone develop self-esteem and self-confidence. | 这真的帮助了一个人 培养自尊和自信。 |
| 28 | Across 35 years of research, | 在35年的研究中, |
| 29 | tens of thousands of hours of counseling other individuals | 数万小时的咨询 |
| 30 | and teaching and supervising, | 以及教学和监督, |
| 31 | there was one element that I remained captivated by | 有一点我一直被迷住了 |
| 32 | and still am to this day, | 直到今天, |
| 33 | and it's unpleasant feelings. | 这是令人不快的感觉。 |
| 34 | Unpleasant feelings. | 不高兴的感觉 |
| 35 | More than anything else, | 更重要的是, |
| 36 | what I found is what holds people back | 我发现的是什么 阻碍人们 |
| 37 | is their inability or their challenges with dealing with unpleasant feelings. | 而是他们无力或面对不愉快情绪的挑战。 |
| 38 | Yet nobody really teaches us what to do or how to handle them. | 然而,没有人真正教我们怎么做,或者如何处理它们。 |
| 39 | It seems so silly. | 这看起来太傻了。 |
| 40 | So silly. | 这么傻。 |
| 41 | I'm excited about unpleasant feelings. | 我对不愉快的感情很兴奋 |
| 42 | Who the heck gets excited about unpleasant feelings? | 谁对不愉快的感情感到兴奋? |
| 43 | If you can experience and move through eight unpleasant feelings, | 如果你能经历和移动 在8不愉快的感情, |
| 44 | you can pursue anything you want in life. | 你可以追求任何你想要的生活。 |
| 45 | How? | 怎么会? |
| 46 | One choice, eight feelings, 90 seconds. | 一个选择,八个感觉,90秒。 |
| 47 | It's a simple formula, | 这是一个简单的公式, |
| 48 | and it's one my colleagues and clients affectionately call the Rosenberg Reset. | 我的同事和客户 都叫罗森伯格重置 |
| 49 | Now, most of us believe that our happiness in life | 现在,我们大多数人相信 我们生活中的幸福 |
| 50 | comes from the big choices that we make, | 来自于我们做出的重大选择, |
| 51 | and it's actually not the big choices. | 这其实不是大选择 |
| 52 | There's a real misconception there. | 这里确实有误解 |
| 53 | It's the moment-to-moment choices. | 即是一时一时之选择. |
| 54 | Those big choices, we think, | 这些大选择,我们认为, |
| 55 | help us determine the degree of our happiness from a day-to-day basis | 帮助我们从日常角度确定幸福的程度 |
| 56 | or our well-being from a day-to-day basis. | 或我们从日常生活。 |
| 57 | Not true. | 不对 |
| 58 | It's actually the little choices, the moment-to-moment ones. | 其实是小选择,即时选择。 |
| 59 | Ponder the moments that you have denied your feelings | 你否认了自己的感情 |
| 60 | as opposed to pay attention to them. | 而不是注意他们。 |
| 61 | It's those that matter. | 这才是最重要的。 |
| 62 | That's what's going to free you up. | 即得解脱. |
| 63 | So let's unpack the formula. | 所以,让我们解开公式。 |
| 64 | One choice. | 一个选择 |
| 65 | Make the choice to stay present, fully present. | 选择留在现场 完全在场 |
| 66 | Be aware of and in touch with your moment-to-moment experience. | 了解和接触你的瞬间感应经验. |
| 67 | It's about awareness, not avoidance. | 而是意识 不是逃避 |
| 68 | Think of a time that you've had a conversation with somebody. | 想想你和某个人谈过了 |
| 69 | Perhaps you've been disappointed in a conversation with your friend | 或许你对你朋友的谈话很失望 |
| 70 | or with your partner or your spouse. | 或与你的伴侣或配偶。 |
| 71 | And check in with yourself here. | 并在这里检查你自己。 |
| 72 | Be gentle. | 温柔点 |
| 73 | Did you do what most of us do? | 你做了我们大多数人做的事吗? |
| 74 | Did you run? | 你跑了吗? |
| 75 | Did you hide? | 你藏起来了吗? |
| 76 | Did you shut down? | 你关机了吗? |
| 77 | Did you distract in really obvious ways, | 你分心的方式很明显吗? |
| 78 | like, I don't know, food, | 像,我不知道, 食物, |
| 79 | alcohol or drugs, sex, pornography, shopping, social media? | 酒精还是毒品,性,色情,购物,社交媒体? |
| 80 | Did you distract or escape in less obvious ways? | 你分心了还是逃跑了? |
| 81 | Tightening up, tightening those muscles, | 紧紧的,紧紧的肌肉, |
| 82 | or holding your breath, or swallowing hard, | 或屏住呼吸,或咽硬, |
| 83 | just to try to keep those feelings at bay. | 只是试着保持这些感情。 |
| 84 | Or did you stay fully present, | 还是你一直在场? |
| 85 | aware of and in touch with your moment-to-moment experience? | 知道你的瞬间经历吗? |
| 86 | That's the best choice, except it's your choice. | 这是最好的选择, 除了这是你的选择。 |
| 87 | You make that one. | 你做那个。 |
| 88 | My prescription? | 我的处方? |
| 89 | Stay present. | 待在这里 |
| 90 | Stay fully present. | 保持完整的在场。 |
| 91 | You can do this. | 你可以做到这一点。 |
| 92 | In fact, we can all do this. | 事实上,我们都能做到。 |
| 93 | It just takes a willingness, it takes a formula, | 它只需要一种意愿, 它需要一个公式, |
| 94 | and it takes a decision. | 并做出一个决定。 |
| 95 | Let's go to the second step. | 入第二阶. |
| 96 | The second step has to do with handling eight unpleasant feelings. | 第二步与处理8种不愉快的感情有关. |
| 97 | They're the unpleasant feelings of sadness, shame, | 他们是悲伤,羞耻的不愉快的感情, |
| 98 | helplessness, anger, vulnerability, | 无助、愤怒、脆弱 |
| 99 | embarrassment, disappointment, and frustration. | 尴尬、失望和沮丧 |
| 100 | Most of us like to see those feelings as bad or negative. | 我们大多数人都喜欢把这些感觉看成是坏的还是消极的. |
| 101 | They're not bad or negative. | 二者不坏不负. |
| 102 | They're simply unpleasant and uncomfortable. | 他们只是不愉快和不舒服。 |
| 103 | So, going forward, can we make an agreement | 所以,前进,我们可以达成协议 |
| 104 | that you're going to shift your language | 你会改变你的语言 |
| 105 | and it's no longer going to be bad or negative feelings? | 不会再是坏的还是消极的? |
| 106 | They're simply going to be unpleasant and uncomfortable. | 他们只是会不愉快和不舒服。 |
| 107 | It's an important shift. | 这是一个重要的转变. |
| 108 | Why, then, do we want to avoid all those feelings? | 那么,为什么我们想避免所有这些感觉? |
| 109 | Well, we're afraid that if they start, they'll never stop. | 好吧,我们害怕如果他们开始, 他们永远不会停止。 |
| 110 | Or they'll be too intense and they will overwhelm us. | 不然他们就会太紧张,会压垮我们 |
| 111 | Or we will lose control or we'll go out of control. | 否则我们就会失去控制 或者我们就会失去控制 |
| 112 | Except the key here is why they're also so important. | 关键是为什么它们也这么重要 |
| 113 | Why does it matter so much? | 这有什么关系? |
| 114 | And it matters because our experience of feeling capable in the world, | 这很重要,因为我们的经验 感觉有能力的世界, |
| 115 | of experiencing emotional strength, | 经历情感力量, |
| 116 | is directly tied to our capacity to both experience | 与我们的能力直接相关 |
| 117 | and move through those unpleasant feelings. | 穿过那些不愉快的感情 |
| 118 | Is it all eight at once? | 全部是八次吗? |
| 119 | No, it's not. | 不,这不是。 |
| 120 | It's one or a few at a time, | 一次一个还是几个 |
| 121 | like we can feel disappointment and anger at the same time. | 就像我们能同时感到失望和愤怒 |
| 122 | So, again, if you can experience and move through | 所以,再次,如果你能体验和移动 |
| 123 | those eight unpleasant feelings of sadness, shame, helplessness, | 那八种悲伤、羞愧、无助的感觉 |
| 124 | anger, vulnerability, embarrassment, disappointment, and frustration, | 愤怒、脆弱、尴尬、失望和挫折, |
| 125 | then you will begin to experience growing confidence and emotional strength. | 然后,你将开始经历 越来越大的信心和情感力量。 |
| 126 | And what do I mean by this move through? | 这是什么意思? |
| 127 | Well, neuroscientists suggest that when an emotional feeling gets triggered, | 神经科学家们建议 当情绪感动时 |
| 128 | that chemicals are released by our brain that flush through our bloodstream | 我们的大脑释放出化学物质 冲进我们的血液 |
| 129 | and they activate bodily sensations. | 并激活身体的感觉。 |
| 130 | It's sort of a biochemical rush and then flush. | 有点生化冲动 然后冲浪 |
| 131 | Let me translate. | 让我翻译一下。 |
| 132 | And this is super important. | 这很重要。 |
| 133 | What we feel emotionally is felt in the body first | 我们的情感是先在身体中感受到的 |
| 134 | as a bodily or physical sensation. | 身体上或身体上的感觉 |
| 135 | It doesn't feel good. | 这感觉不太好。 |
| 136 | Let me repeat that. | 让我重复一遍。 |
| 137 | What we feel emotionally is experienced in the body first | 我们的感情是先在身体中体验的 |
| 138 | as a bodily or physical sensation. | 身体上或身体上的感觉 |
| 139 | That's what we want to distract from. | 这就是我们要分散注意力的原因 |
| 140 | That's what we want to get away from. | 这就是我们想要摆脱的。 |
| 141 | It's not that we don't want to feel something emotionally. | 这并不是说我们不想有感情的感觉 |
| 142 | We absolutely do want to feel emotionally. | 我们确实想感受情感 |
| 143 | We want the whole range of feelings. | 我们要所有的感觉 |
| 144 | We just don't want the bodily sensations that let us know what we're feeling. | 我们只是不希望身体的感觉 告诉我们我们的感受。 |
| 145 | What unpleasant feelings might you be moving away from? | 什么样的不愉快的感情 你可能会离开? |
| 146 | What might be holding you back? | 是什么让你退缩了? |
| 147 | Stop and notice where you might experience it in your body. | 停下来,注意你身体里可能有什么感受 |
| 148 | And if there's a time where you ever said to yourself, | 如果你曾经对自己说过 |
| 149 | I never want to experience that again, | 我再也不想经历那种事了 |
| 150 | it's probably some of those feelings are ones to move towards, | 可能有些感觉是朝向 |
| 151 | to start to embrace. | 开始拥抱。 |
| 152 | For me, it was involved with that gut punch. | 对我来说,它与 肠道拳。 |
| 153 | Embarrassment was really difficult. | 尴尬是很难的。 |
| 154 | So was disappointment. | 失望也一样。 |
| 155 | And so was vulnerability. | 脆弱性也是如此。 |
| 156 | But let's get to the solution. | 但求解脱. |
| 157 | The solution has to do with riding the wave. | 解决之道与骑浪有关. |
| 158 | Remember that biochemical rush I mentioned a few moments ago? | 记得我刚才提到的生化热吗? |
| 159 | That biochemical rush we can think of as a wave. | 那种生化的冲动,我们可以想象成波浪。 |
| 160 | And when that wave gets fired off in the body, | 当那波在身体里被射掉时 |
| 161 | it lasts roughly 60 to 90 seconds, | 它大约持续60到90秒, |
| 162 | which means feelings are temporary. | 也就是说感情是暂时的 |
| 163 | So from the time it gets fired off in the brain | 因此,从它被炒掉的大脑 |
| 164 | and it goes through our bloodstream and then dissipates, | 它穿过我们的血液 然后消散 |
| 165 | 60 to 90 seconds. | 60秒到90秒. |
| 166 | You can handle 60 to 90 seconds, right? | 你能处理60到90秒,对吧? |
| 167 | Heck, that's less than half a song. | 这还不到半首 |
| 168 | All of us can do that. | 我们都能做到 |
| 169 | And if you think of a beach, let me draw a parallel. | 如果你想到一个海滩, 让我画一个平行。 |
| 170 | If you think of a beach, | 如果你想到海滩, |
| 171 | then as you walk along that shoreline, | 当你沿着海岸线走的时候 |
| 172 | what you'll notice is that the waves can come up tumultuously, | 你会发现,波浪会突然涌现 |
| 173 | they can come up moderately, they can come up mildly. | 他们可以温和地上来 他们可以温和地上来 |
| 174 | And if we're walking along that shoreline, | 如果我们沿着海岸线走 |
| 175 | we'll notice that the waves seem to just hang and linger for a moment | 我们会注意到,浪似乎只是 挂和停留片刻 |
| 176 | before they subside. | 在他们屈服之前 |
| 177 | And you know what? | 你知道吗? |
| 178 | That's also true for our feelings. | 我们的感情也是这样 |
| 179 | They can come up tumultuously, moderately, mildly, | 它们会突如其来的 中度的 轻度的 |
| 180 | and they seem to linger or hang for a moment. | 他们似乎停留或挂了一会儿。 |
| 181 | And then they always subside. | 然后他们总是退缩。 |
| 182 | That's the beauty of it. | 这就是它的美丽。 |
| 183 | Always subside. | 总是退缩。 |
| 184 | Is it one wave? | 是一波吗? |
| 185 | No, it's not. | 不,这不是。 |
| 186 | It's more than one wave. | 一波多罗. |
| 187 | Anytime you think about the same memory, | 每当你想起同样的记忆, |
| 188 | it's going to fire off that same approximate wave. | 它会发射出相同的大致波。 |
| 189 | And grief, grief is waves of waves. | 悲伤,悲伤是波浪 |
| 190 | The feelings of anger and sadness and disappointment | 愤怒、悲伤和失望的感觉 |
| 191 | kind of all mixed together. | 有点混合在一起。 |
| 192 | Anybody who's experienced a significant loss knows this. | 任何经历了重大损失的人都知道这一点。 |
| 193 | Those waves can come up so tumultuously and unexpectedly or spontaneously, | 这些波浪会突如其来 出乎意料或自发地涌现出来 |
| 194 | and it's like we're just kind of left with them. | 就像我们跟他们一样 |
| 195 | And they will always subside. | 他们将永远退缩。 |
| 196 | So the thing, again, here for you to do | 所以事情,再次,在这里你做 |
| 197 | is to stay present to the experience, | 保持经验, |
| 198 | surf those 90 second waves, | 冲浪这90秒浪, |
| 199 | surf them any way you want, | 你想怎么冲就怎么冲 |
| 200 | and just let them ride out their course. | 让他们离开他们的航线 |
| 201 | In the moment, you'll feel centered, you'll feel calm, and you'll feel relief. | 此时会感到中心化,感到平静,感到宽慰. |
| 202 | Insights will follow. | 洞察力会随之而来. |
| 203 | And with consistent practice, | 和一致的做法, |
| 204 | you may even be able to unhook from old life stories. | 你甚至可以从旧生活故事中解脱出来 |
| 205 | I have been the joyful recipient of countless stories | 我曾经是无数故事的快乐收听者 |
| 206 | of individuals who have mended relationships, | 已修正关系的个人, |
| 207 | who have engaged in courageous conversations, | 他们进行了勇敢的对话, |
| 208 | who have pursued goals that they wanted to pursue. | 他们追求自己想要追求的目标。 |
| 209 | And the most important one, I think, | 而最重要的一个,我想, |
| 210 | is when people come back and tell me | 当人们回来告诉我 |
| 211 | that they feel so much more comfortable in their own skin. | 让他们在自己的皮肤中感觉更舒服 |
| 212 | That's the benefit. | 这就是好处。 |
| 213 | I thought when I was called boring was a low moment in my life. | 我以为当我被叫作无聊的时候 是我人生中一个低调的时刻 |
| 214 | It turns out that moment shifted me, | 事实证明那一刻改变了我 |
| 215 | and it's enabled me to shift countless thousands of lives. | 它使我能够改变无数人的生命。 |
| 216 | So the next time you experience unpleasant feelings, | 所以,下一次你经历不愉快的感情, |
| 217 | embrace them, join me in the excitement. | 拥抱他们,加入我的兴奋。 |
| 218 | Know that they are the path back to you being more fully you. | 知道他们是回到你更完整的道路吗? |
| 219 | Stay present. | 待在这里 |
| 220 | Stay fully present. | 保持完整的在场。 |
| 221 | Experience them. | 体验他们。 |
| 222 | Surf those waves. | 冲浪浪 |
| 223 | It won't take years. | 不须数年. |
| 224 | It won't even take a day. | 它甚至不会花一天。 |
| 225 | In fact, it will take just a moment. | 事实上,只需要一分钟。 |
| 226 | Start right now. | 现在开始 |
该视频共有字幕 226 条。解锁更多字幕为会员功能，请移动到 价格
P2 · 如何扛住90秒情绪浪潮【TED演讲】 p02 英文字幕(注释+中文外挂) (P2)
字幕摘录
| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 0:01 | I'm 19 years old. | 年十九岁. |
| 0:06 | I'm a camp counselor at a northern Minnesota summer camp, | 我是明尼苏达州北部夏令营的营房顾问 |
| 0:10 | and I'm on a hayride. | 我在干草坪上 |
| 0:13 | It's a beautiful night, | 这是一个美丽的夜晚, |
| 0:16 | and I'm listening in to the conversation next to me, | 我在听旁边的谈话 |
| 0:19 | trying to figure out how to break in, | 试图找出如何闯入, |
| 0:22 | keeping kind to myself, | 对我好 |
| 0:24 | not sure where it was going, how I could break in. | 不知道它要去哪里,我怎么会闯进来。 |
| 0:29 | And just as we're about to turn into the girls' camp from the boys' camp, | 就像我们即将变成 女孩的营地 从男孩的营地, |
| 0:33 | which is where we were headed, | 这就是我们要去的地方 |
展开字幕全文（231 条）
| 序号 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | I'm 19 years old. | 年十九岁. |
| 2 | I'm a camp counselor at a northern Minnesota summer camp, | 我是明尼苏达州北部夏令营的营房顾问 |
| 3 | and I'm on a hayride. | 我在干草坪上 |
| 4 | It's a beautiful night, | 这是一个美丽的夜晚, |
| 5 | and I'm listening in to the conversation next to me, | 我在听旁边的谈话 |
| 6 | trying to figure out how to break in, | 试图找出如何闯入, |
| 7 | keeping kind to myself, | 对我好 |
| 8 | not sure where it was going, how I could break in. | 不知道它要去哪里,我怎么会闯进来。 |
| 9 | And just as we're about to turn into the girls' camp from the boys' camp, | 就像我们即将变成 女孩的营地 从男孩的营地, |
| 10 | which is where we were headed, | 这就是我们要去的地方 |
| 11 | one of the counselors turns to me, looks at me, | 其中一个顾问转过来 看着我 |
| 12 | elbows me in the ribs and says, | 肘着我的肋骨说, |
| 13 | Hey, Joan, you know what? | 嘿,琼,你知道吗? |
| 14 | You're boring. | 你真无聊 |
| 15 | Whoa. | 珃 |
| 16 | Boring? | 无聊? |
| 17 | What? | 你说什么? |
| 18 | I felt like she took a fork, | 我觉得她拿走了叉子 |
| 19 | stabbed it in my gut and just spun it around. | 刺进我的肠胃,然后转过来 |
| 20 | Now, most of us have our own versions of those gut punch moments. | 现在,我们大多数人都有我们自己的版本 那些直觉的冲动时刻。 |
| 21 | I'm not sure what it is for you, | 我不知道这是给你的 |
| 22 | but that was a big moment for me. | 但对我来说这是一个重大的时刻。 |
| 23 | And that moment, | 而那一刻, |
| 24 | and a few other key life experiences, | 和其他一些重要的人生经历, |
| 25 | really sparked my interest to become a psychologist | 真正激发了我成为心理学家的兴趣 |
| 26 | and to understand what it was | 并了解这是什么 |
| 27 | that really helped someone develop self-esteem and self-confidence. | 这真的帮助了一个人 培养自尊和自信。 |
| 28 | Across 35 years of research, | 在35年的研究中, |
| 29 | tens of thousands of hours of counseling other individuals | 数万小时的咨询 |
| 30 | and teaching and supervising, | 以及教学和监督, |
| 31 | there was one element that I remained captivated by | 有一点我一直被迷住了 |
| 32 | and still am to this day, | 直到今天, |
| 33 | and it's unpleasant feelings. | 这是令人不快的感觉。 |
| 34 | Unpleasant feelings. | 不高兴的感觉 |
| 35 | More than anything else, | 更重要的是, |
| 36 | what I found is what holds people back | 我发现的是什么 阻碍人们 |
| 37 | is their inability or their challenges with dealing with unpleasant feelings. | 而是他们无力或面对不愉快情绪的挑战。 |
| 38 | Yet nobody really teaches us what to do or how to handle them. | 然而,没有人真正教我们怎么做,或者如何处理它们。 |
| 39 | It seems so silly. | 这看起来太傻了。 |
| 40 | So silly. | 这么傻。 |
| 41 | I'm excited about unpleasant feelings. | 我对不愉快的感情很兴奋 |
| 42 | Who the heck gets excited about unpleasant feelings? | 谁对不愉快的感情感到兴奋? |
| 43 | If you can experience and move through eight unpleasant feelings, | 如果你能经历和移动 在8不愉快的感情, |
| 44 | you can pursue anything you want in life. | 你可以追求任何你想要的生活。 |
| 45 | How? | 怎么会? |
| 46 | One choice, eight feelings, 90 seconds. | 一个选择,八个感觉,90秒。 |
| 47 | It's a simple formula, | 这是一个简单的公式, |
| 48 | and it's one my colleagues and clients affectionately call the Rosenberg Reset. | 我的同事和客户 都叫罗森伯格重置 |
| 49 | Now, most of us believe that our happiness in life | 现在,我们大多数人相信 我们生活中的幸福 |
| 50 | comes from the big choices that we make. | 来自于我们所做的重大选择。 |
| 51 | And it's actually not the big choices. | 实际上这不是大的选择。 |
| 52 | There's a real misconception there. | 这里确实有误解 |
| 53 | It's the moment-to-moment choices. | 即是一时一时之选择. |
| 54 | Those big choices, we think, | 这些大选择,我们认为, |
| 55 | help us determine the degree of our happiness from a day-to-day basis | 帮助我们从日常角度确定幸福的程度 |
| 56 | or our well-being from a day-to-day basis. | 或我们从日常生活。 |
| 57 | Not true. | 不对 |
| 58 | It's actually the little choices, the moment-to-moment ones. | 其实是小选择,即时选择。 |
| 59 | Ponder the moments that you have denied your feelings | 你否认了自己的感情 |
| 60 | as opposed to pay attention to them. | 而不是注意他们。 |
| 61 | It's those that matter. | 这才是最重要的。 |
| 62 | That's what's going to free you up. | 即得解脱. |
| 63 | So let's unpack the formula. | 所以,让我们解开公式。 |
| 64 | One choice. | 一个选择 |
| 65 | Make the choice to stay present, fully present. | 选择留在现场 完全在场 |
| 66 | Be aware of and in touch with your moment-to-moment experience. | 了解和接触你的瞬间感应经验. |
| 67 | It's about awareness, not avoidance. | 而是意识 不是逃避 |
| 68 | Think of a time that you've had a conversation with somebody. | 想想你和某个人谈过了 |
| 69 | Perhaps you've been disappointed in a conversation with your friend | 或许你对你朋友的谈话很失望 |
| 70 | or with your partner or your spouse. | 或与你的伴侣或配偶。 |
| 71 | And check in with yourself here. | 并在这里检查你自己。 |
| 72 | Be gentle. | 温柔点 |
| 73 | Did you do what most of us do? | 你做了我们大多数人做的事吗? |
| 74 | Did you run? | 你跑了吗? |
| 75 | Did you hide? | 你藏起来了吗? |
| 76 | Did you shut down? | 你关机了吗? |
| 77 | Did you distract in really obvious ways, | 你分心的方式很明显吗? |
| 78 | like, I don't know, food? | 像,我不知道,食物吗? |
| 79 | Alcohol or drugs? | 酒精还是毒品? |
| 80 | Sex? | 做爱? |
| 81 | Pornography? | 色情吗? |
| 82 | Shopping? | 购物? |
| 83 | Social media? | 社交媒体? |
| 84 | Did you distract or escape in less obvious ways? | 你分心了还是逃跑了? |
| 85 | Tightening up, tightening those muscles, | 紧紧的,紧紧的肌肉, |
| 86 | or holding your breath or swallowing hard | 或屏住呼吸 或咽硬 |
| 87 | just to try to keep those feelings at bay? | 只是试图保持这些感情 隐藏? |
| 88 | Or did you stay fully present, | 还是你一直在场? |
| 89 | aware of and in touch with your moment-to-moment experience? | 知道你的瞬间经历吗? |
| 90 | That's the best choice, except it's your choice. | 这是最好的选择, 除了这是你的选择。 |
| 91 | You make that one. | 你做那个。 |
| 92 | My prescription? | 我的处方? |
| 93 | Stay present. | 待在这里 |
| 94 | Stay fully present. | 保持完整的在场。 |
| 95 | You can do this. | 你可以做到这一点。 |
| 96 | In fact, we can all do this. | 事实上,我们都能做到。 |
| 97 | It just takes a willingness, it takes a formula, | 它只需要一种意愿, 它需要一个公式, |
| 98 | and it takes a decision. | 并做出一个决定。 |
| 99 | Let's go to the second step. | 入第二阶. |
| 100 | The second step has to do with handling eight unpleasant feelings. | 第二步与处理8种不愉快的感情有关. |
| 101 | They're the unpleasant feelings of sadness, | 他们是悲伤的不愉快的感觉, |
| 102 | shame, helplessness, | 羞耻,无助, |
| 103 | anger, vulnerability, embarrassment, | 愤怒 脆弱 尴尬 |
| 104 | disappointment, and frustration. | 失望和挫折 |
| 105 | Most of us like to see those feelings as bad or negative. | 我们大多数人都喜欢把这些感觉看成是坏的还是消极的. |
| 106 | They're not bad or negative. | 二者不坏不负. |
| 107 | They're simply unpleasant and uncomfortable. | 他们只是不愉快和不舒服。 |
| 108 | So, going forward, can we make an agreement | 所以,前进,我们可以达成协议 |
| 109 | that you're going to shift your language | 你会改变你的语言 |
| 110 | and it's no longer going to be bad or negative feelings? | 不会再是坏的还是消极的? |
| 111 | They're simply going to be unpleasant and uncomfortable. | 他们只是会不愉快和不舒服。 |
| 112 | It's an important shift. | 这是一个重要的转变. |
| 113 | Why then do we want to avoid all those feelings? | 那为什么我们想避免所有这些感觉? |
| 114 | Well, we're afraid that if they start, then they'll overstop, | 好吧,我们害怕,如果他们开始, 然后他们会压倒, |
| 115 | or they'll be too intense and they will overwhelm us, | 否则他们就会太紧张 把我们压垮 |
| 116 | or we will lose control or we'll go out of control. | 否则我们就会失去控制 否则我们就会失去控制 |
| 117 | Except the key here is why they're also so important. | 关键是为什么它们也这么重要 |
| 118 | Why does it matter so much? | 这有什么关系? |
| 119 | And it matters because our experience of feeling capable in the world, | 这很重要,因为我们的经验 感觉有能力的世界, |
| 120 | of experiencing emotional strength, | 经历情感力量, |
| 121 | is directly tied to our capacity to both experience | 与我们的能力直接相关 |
| 122 | and move through those unpleasant feelings. | 穿过那些不愉快的感情 |
| 123 | Is it all eight at once? | 全部是八次吗? |
| 124 | No, it's not. | 不,这不是。 |
| 125 | It's one or a few at a time, | 一次一个还是几个 |
| 126 | like we can feel disappointment and anger at the same time. | 就像我们能同时感到失望和愤怒 |
| 127 | So, again, if you can experience and move through | 所以,再次,如果你能体验和移动 |
| 128 | those eight unpleasant feelings of sadness, shame, helplessness, | 那八种悲伤、羞愧、无助的感觉 |
| 129 | anger, vulnerability, embarrassment, disappointment, and frustration, | 愤怒、脆弱、尴尬、失望和挫折, |
| 130 | then you will begin to experience growing confidence and emotional strength. | 然后,你将开始经历 越来越大的信心和情感力量。 |
| 131 | And what do I mean by this move through? | 这是什么意思? |
| 132 | Well, neuroscientists suggest that when an emotional feeling gets triggered, | 神经科学家们建议 当情绪感动时 |
| 133 | that chemicals are released by our brain that flush through our bloodstream | 我们的大脑释放出化学物质 冲进我们的血液 |
| 134 | and they activate bodily sensations. | 并激活身体的感觉。 |
| 135 | It's sort of a biochemical rush and then flush. | 有点生化冲动 然后冲浪 |
| 136 | Let me translate, and this is super important. | 让我翻译一下 这很重要 |
| 137 | What we feel emotionally is felt in the body first | 我们的情感是先在身体中感受到的 |
| 138 | as a bodily or physical sensation. | 身体上或身体上的感觉 |
| 139 | It doesn't feel good. | 这感觉不太好。 |
| 140 | Let me repeat that. | 让我重复一遍。 |
| 141 | What we feel emotionally is experienced in the body first | 我们的感情是先在身体中体验的 |
| 142 | as a bodily or physical sensation. | 身体上或身体上的感觉 |
| 143 | That's what we want to distract from. | 这就是我们要分散注意力的原因 |
| 144 | That's what we want to get away from. | 这就是我们想要摆脱的。 |
| 145 | It's not that we don't want to feel something emotionally. | 这并不是说我们不想有感情的感觉 |
| 146 | We absolutely do want to feel emotionally. | 我们确实想感受情感 |
| 147 | We want the whole range of feelings. | 我们要所有的感觉 |
| 148 | We just don't want the bodily sensations that let us know what we're feeling. | 我们只是不希望身体的感觉 告诉我们我们的感受。 |
| 149 | What unpleasant feelings might you be moving away from? | 什么样的不愉快的感情 你可能会离开? |
| 150 | What might be holding you back? | 是什么让你退缩了? |
| 151 | Stop and notice where you might experience it in your body. | 停下来,注意你身体里可能有什么感受 |
| 152 | And if there's a time where you ever said to yourself, | 如果你曾经对自己说过 |
| 153 | I never want to experience that again, | 我再也不想经历那种事了 |
| 154 | it's probably some of those feelings are ones to move towards, | 可能有些感觉是朝向 |
| 155 | to start to embrace. | 开始拥抱。 |
| 156 | For me, it was involved with that gut punch. | 对我来说,它与 肠道拳。 |
| 157 | Embarrassment was really difficult. | 尴尬是很难的。 |
| 158 | So was disappointment. | 失望也一样。 |
| 159 | And so was vulnerability. | 脆弱性也是如此。 |
| 160 | But let's get to the solution. | 但求解脱. |
| 161 | The solution has to do with riding the wave. | 解决之道与骑浪有关. |
| 162 | Remember that biochemical rush I mentioned a few moments ago? | 记得我刚才提到的生化热吗? |
| 163 | That biochemical rush we can think of as a wave. | 那种生化的冲动,我们可以想象成波浪。 |
| 164 | And when that wave gets fired off in the body, | 当那波在身体里被射掉时 |
| 165 | it lasts roughly 60 to 90 seconds, | 它大约持续60到90秒, |
| 166 | which means feelings are temporary. | 也就是说感情是暂时的 |
| 167 | So from the time it gets fired off in the brain | 因此,从它被炒掉的大脑 |
| 168 | and it goes through our bloodstream and then dissipates, | 它穿过我们的血液 然后消散 |
| 169 | 60 to 90 seconds. | 60秒到90秒. |
| 170 | You can handle 60 to 90 seconds, right? | 你能处理60到90秒,对吧? |
| 171 | Heck, that's less than half a song. | 这还不到半首 |
| 172 | All of us can do that. | 我们都能做到 |
| 173 | And if you think of a beach, | 如果你想到海滩, |
| 174 | let me draw a parallel. | 让我画一个平行。 |
| 175 | If you think of a beach, | 如果你想到海滩, |
| 176 | then as you walk along that shoreline, | 当你沿着海岸线走的时候 |
| 177 | what you'll notice is that the waves can come up tumultuously, | 你会发现,波浪会突然涌现 |
| 178 | they can come up moderately, they can come up mildly. | 他们可以温和地上来 他们可以温和地上来 |
| 179 | And if we're walking along that shoreline, | 如果我们沿着海岸线走 |
| 180 | we'll notice that the waves seem to just hang and linger for a moment | 我们会注意到,浪似乎只是 挂和停留片刻 |
| 181 | before they subside. | 在他们屈服之前 |
| 182 | And you know what? | 你知道吗? |
| 183 | That's also true for our feelings. | 我们的感情也是这样 |
| 184 | They can come up tumultuously, moderately, mildly, | 它们会突如其来的 中度的 轻度的 |
| 185 | and they seem to linger or hang for a moment. | 他们似乎停留或挂了一会儿。 |
| 186 | And then they always subside. | 然后他们总是退缩。 |
| 187 | That's the beauty of it. | 这就是它的美丽。 |
| 188 | Always subside. | 总是退缩。 |
| 189 | Is it one wave? | 是一波吗? |
| 190 | No, it's not. | 不,这不是。 |
| 191 | It's more than one wave. | 一波多罗. |
| 192 | Anytime you think about the same memory, | 每当你想起同样的记忆, |
| 193 | it's going to fire off that same approximate wave. | 它会发射出相同的大致波。 |
| 194 | And grief, grief is waves of waves. | 悲伤,悲伤是波浪 |
| 195 | The feelings of anger and sadness and disappointment | 愤怒、悲伤和失望的感觉 |
| 196 | kind of all mixed together. | 有点混合在一起。 |
| 197 | Anybody who's experienced a significant loss knows this. | 任何经历了重大损失的人都知道这一点。 |
| 198 | Those waves can come up so tumultuously and unexpectedly or spontaneously, | 这些波浪会突如其来 出乎意料或自发地涌现出来 |
| 199 | and it's like we're just kind of left with them. | 就像我们跟他们一样 |
| 200 | And they will always subside. | 他们将永远退缩。 |
| 201 | So the thing, again, here for you to do | 所以事情,再次,在这里你做 |
| 202 | is to stay present to the experience, | 保持经验, |
| 203 | surf those 90-second waves, | 冲浪90秒的浪 |
| 204 | surf them any way you want, | 你想怎么冲就怎么冲 |
| 205 | and just let them ride out their course. | 让他们离开他们的航线 |
| 206 | In the moment, you'll feel centered, you'll feel calm, and you'll feel relief. | 此时会感到中心化,感到平静,感到宽慰. |
| 207 | Insights will follow. | 洞察力会随之而来. |
| 208 | And with consistent practice, | 和一致的做法, |
| 209 | you may even be able to unhook from old life stories. | 你甚至可以从旧生活故事中解脱出来 |
| 210 | I have been the joyful recipient of countless stories | 我曾经是无数故事的快乐收听者 |
| 211 | of individuals who have mended relationships, | 已修正关系的个人, |
| 212 | who have engaged in courageous conversations, | 他们进行了勇敢的对话, |
| 213 | who have pursued goals that they wanted to pursue. | 他们追求自己想要追求的目标。 |
| 214 | And the most important one, I think, | 而最重要的一个,我想, |
| 215 | is when people come back and tell me | 当人们回来告诉我 |
| 216 | that they feel so much more comfortable in their own skin. | 让他们在自己的皮肤中感觉更舒服 |
| 217 | That's the benefit. | 这就是好处。 |
| 218 | I thought when I was called boring was a low moment in my life. | 我以为当我被叫作无聊的时候 是我人生中一个低调的时刻 |
| 219 | It turns out that moment shifted me, | 事实证明那一刻改变了我 |
| 220 | and it's enabled me to shift countless thousands of lives. | 它使我能够改变无数人的生命。 |
| 221 | So the next time you experience unpleasant feelings, | 所以,下一次你经历不愉快的感情, |
| 222 | embrace them, join me in the excitement. | 拥抱他们,加入我的兴奋。 |
| 223 | Know that they are the path back to you being more fully you. | 知道他们是回到你更完整的道路吗? |
| 224 | Stay present. | 待在这里 |
| 225 | Stay fully present. | 保持完整的在场。 |
| 226 | Experience them. | 体验他们。 |
| 227 | Surf those waves. | 冲浪浪 |
| 228 | It won't take years. | 不须数年. |
| 229 | It won't even take a day. | 它甚至不会花一天。 |
| 230 | In fact, it will take just a moment. | 事实上,只需要一分钟。 |
| 231 | Start right now. | 现在开始 |
该视频共有字幕 231 条。解锁更多字幕为会员功能，请移动到 价格
P3 · 如何扛住90秒情绪浪潮【TED演讲】 p03 无字幕(中英外挂) (P3)
字幕摘录
| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 0:01 | I'm 19 years old. | 年十九岁. |
| 0:06 | I'm a camp counselor at a northern Minnesota summer camp, | 我是明尼苏达州北部夏令营的营房顾问 |
| 0:10 | and I'm on a hayride. | 我在干草坪上 |
| 0:13 | It's a beautiful night, | 这是一个美丽的夜晚, |
| 0:16 | and I'm listening in to the conversation next to me, | 我在听旁边的谈话 |
| 0:19 | trying to figure out how to break in, | 试图找出如何闯入, |
| 0:22 | keeping kind to myself, | 对我好 |
| 0:24 | not sure where it was going, how I could break in. | 不知道它要去哪里,我怎么会闯进来。 |
| 0:29 | And just as we're about to turn into the girls' camp from the boys' camp, | 就像我们即将变成 女孩的营地 从男孩的营地, |
| 0:33 | which is where we were headed, | 这就是我们要去的地方 |
展开字幕全文（226 条）
| 序号 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | I'm 19 years old. | 年十九岁. |
| 2 | I'm a camp counselor at a northern Minnesota summer camp, | 我是明尼苏达州北部夏令营的营房顾问 |
| 3 | and I'm on a hayride. | 我在干草坪上 |
| 4 | It's a beautiful night, | 这是一个美丽的夜晚, |
| 5 | and I'm listening in to the conversation next to me, | 我在听旁边的谈话 |
| 6 | trying to figure out how to break in, | 试图找出如何闯入, |
| 7 | keeping kind to myself, | 对我好 |
| 8 | not sure where it was going, how I could break in. | 不知道它要去哪里,我怎么会闯进来。 |
| 9 | And just as we're about to turn into the girls' camp from the boys' camp, | 就像我们即将变成 女孩的营地 从男孩的营地, |
| 10 | which is where we were headed, | 这就是我们要去的地方 |
| 11 | one of the counselors turns to me, looks at me, | 其中一个顾问转过来 看着我 |
| 12 | elbows me in the ribs and says, | 肘着我的肋骨说, |
| 13 | Hey, Joan, you know what? | 嘿,琼,你知道吗? |
| 14 | You're boring. | 你真无聊 |
| 15 | Whoa. | 珃 |
| 16 | Boring? | 无聊? |
| 17 | What? | 你说什么? |
| 18 | I felt like she took a fork, | 我觉得她拿走了叉子 |
| 19 | stabbed it in my gut and just spun it around. | 刺进我的肠胃,然后转过来 |
| 20 | Now, most of us have our own versions of those gut punch moments. | 现在,我们大多数人都有我们自己的版本 那些直觉的冲动时刻。 |
| 21 | I'm not sure what it is for you, | 我不知道这是给你的 |
| 22 | but that was a big moment for me. | 但对我来说这是一个重大的时刻。 |
| 23 | And that moment, | 而那一刻, |
| 24 | and a few other key life experiences, | 和其他一些重要的人生经历, |
| 25 | really sparked my interest to become a psychologist | 真正激发了我成为心理学家的兴趣 |
| 26 | and to understand what it was | 并了解这是什么 |
| 27 | that really helped someone develop self-esteem and self-confidence. | 这真的帮助了一个人 培养自尊和自信。 |
| 28 | Across 35 years of research, | 在35年的研究中, |
| 29 | tens of thousands of hours of counseling other individuals | 数万小时的咨询 |
| 30 | and teaching and supervising, | 以及教学和监督, |
| 31 | there was one element that I remained captivated by | 有一点我一直被迷住了 |
| 32 | and still am to this day, | 直到今天, |
| 33 | and it's unpleasant feelings. | 这是令人不快的感觉。 |
| 34 | Unpleasant feelings. | 不高兴的感觉 |
| 35 | More than anything else, | 更重要的是, |
| 36 | what I found is what holds people back | 我发现的是什么 阻碍人们 |
| 37 | is their inability or their challenges with dealing with unpleasant feelings. | 而是他们无力或面对不愉快情绪的挑战。 |
| 38 | Yet nobody really teaches us what to do or how to handle them. | 然而,没有人真正教我们怎么做,或者如何处理它们。 |
| 39 | It seems so silly. | 这看起来太傻了。 |
| 40 | So silly. | 这么傻。 |
| 41 | I'm excited about unpleasant feelings. | 我对不愉快的感情很兴奋 |
| 42 | Who the heck gets excited about unpleasant feelings? | 谁对不愉快的感情感到兴奋? |
| 43 | If you can experience and move through eight unpleasant feelings, | 如果你能经历和移动 在8不愉快的感情, |
| 44 | you can pursue anything you want in life. | 你可以追求任何你想要的生活。 |
| 45 | How? | 怎么会? |
| 46 | One choice, eight feelings, 90 seconds. | 一个选择,八个感觉,90秒。 |
| 47 | It's a simple formula, | 这是一个简单的公式, |
| 48 | and it's one my colleagues and clients affectionately call the Rosenberg Reset. | 我的同事和客户 都叫罗森伯格重置 |
| 49 | Now, most of us believe that our happiness in life | 现在,我们大多数人相信 我们生活中的幸福 |
| 50 | comes from the big choices that we make, | 来自于我们做出的重大选择, |
| 51 | and it's actually not the big choices. | 这其实不是大选择 |
| 52 | There's a real misconception there. | 这里确实有误解 |
| 53 | It's the moment-to-moment choices. | 即是一时一时之选择. |
| 54 | Those big choices, we think, | 这些大选择,我们认为, |
| 55 | help us determine the degree of our happiness from a day-to-day basis | 帮助我们从日常角度确定幸福的程度 |
| 56 | or our well-being from a day-to-day basis. | 或我们从日常生活。 |
| 57 | Not true. | 不对 |
| 58 | It's actually the little choices, the moment-to-moment ones. | 其实是小选择,即时选择。 |
| 59 | Ponder the moments that you have denied your feelings | 你否认了自己的感情 |
| 60 | as opposed to pay attention to them. | 而不是注意他们。 |
| 61 | It's those that matter. | 这才是最重要的。 |
| 62 | That's what's going to free you up. | 即得解脱. |
| 63 | So let's unpack the formula. | 所以,让我们解开公式。 |
| 64 | One choice. | 一个选择 |
| 65 | Make the choice to stay present, fully present. | 选择留在现场 完全在场 |
| 66 | Be aware of and in touch with your moment-to-moment experience. | 了解和接触你的瞬间感应经验. |
| 67 | It's about awareness, not avoidance. | 而是意识 不是逃避 |
| 68 | Think of a time that you've had a conversation with somebody. | 想想你和某个人谈过了 |
| 69 | Perhaps you've been disappointed in a conversation with your friend | 或许你对你朋友的谈话很失望 |
| 70 | or with your partner or your spouse. | 或与你的伴侣或配偶。 |
| 71 | And check in with yourself here. | 并在这里检查你自己。 |
| 72 | Be gentle. | 温柔点 |
| 73 | Did you do what most of us do? | 你做了我们大多数人做的事吗? |
| 74 | Did you run? | 你跑了吗? |
| 75 | Did you hide? | 你藏起来了吗? |
| 76 | Did you shut down? | 你关机了吗? |
| 77 | Did you distract in really obvious ways, | 你分心的方式很明显吗? |
| 78 | like, I don't know, food, | 像,我不知道, 食物, |
| 79 | alcohol or drugs, sex, pornography, shopping, social media? | 酒精还是毒品,性,色情,购物,社交媒体? |
| 80 | Did you distract or escape in less obvious ways? | 你分心了还是逃跑了? |
| 81 | Tightening up, tightening those muscles, | 紧紧的,紧紧的肌肉, |
| 82 | or holding your breath, or swallowing hard, | 或屏住呼吸,或咽硬, |
| 83 | just to try to keep those feelings at bay. | 只是试着保持这些感情。 |
| 84 | Or did you stay fully present, | 还是你一直在场? |
| 85 | aware of and in touch with your moment-to-moment experience? | 知道你的瞬间经历吗? |
| 86 | That's the best choice, except it's your choice. | 这是最好的选择, 除了这是你的选择。 |
| 87 | You make that one. | 你做那个。 |
| 88 | My prescription? | 我的处方? |
| 89 | Stay present. | 待在这里 |
| 90 | Stay fully present. | 保持完整的在场。 |
| 91 | You can do this. | 你可以做到这一点。 |
| 92 | In fact, we can all do this. | 事实上,我们都能做到。 |
| 93 | It just takes a willingness, it takes a formula, | 它只需要一种意愿, 它需要一个公式, |
| 94 | and it takes a decision. | 并做出一个决定。 |
| 95 | Let's go to the second step. | 入第二阶. |
| 96 | The second step has to do with handling eight unpleasant feelings. | 第二步与处理8种不愉快的感情有关. |
| 97 | They're the unpleasant feelings of sadness, shame, | 他们是悲伤,羞耻的不愉快的感情, |
| 98 | helplessness, anger, vulnerability, | 无助、愤怒、脆弱 |
| 99 | embarrassment, disappointment, and frustration. | 尴尬、失望和沮丧 |
| 100 | Most of us like to see those feelings as bad or negative. | 我们大多数人都喜欢把这些感觉看成是坏的还是消极的. |
| 101 | They're not bad or negative. | 二者不坏不负. |
| 102 | They're simply unpleasant and uncomfortable. | 他们只是不愉快和不舒服。 |
| 103 | So, going forward, can we make an agreement | 所以,前进,我们可以达成协议 |
| 104 | that you're going to shift your language | 你会改变你的语言 |
| 105 | and it's no longer going to be bad or negative feelings? | 不会再是坏的还是消极的? |
| 106 | They're simply going to be unpleasant and uncomfortable. | 他们只是会不愉快和不舒服。 |
| 107 | It's an important shift. | 这是一个重要的转变. |
| 108 | Why, then, do we want to avoid all those feelings? | 那么,为什么我们想避免所有这些感觉? |
| 109 | Well, we're afraid that if they start, they'll never stop. | 好吧,我们害怕如果他们开始, 他们永远不会停止。 |
| 110 | Or they'll be too intense and they will overwhelm us. | 不然他们就会太紧张,会压垮我们 |
| 111 | Or we will lose control or we'll go out of control. | 否则我们就会失去控制 或者我们就会失去控制 |
| 112 | Except the key here is why they're also so important. | 关键是为什么它们也这么重要 |
| 113 | Why does it matter so much? | 这有什么关系? |
| 114 | And it matters because our experience of feeling capable in the world, | 这很重要,因为我们的经验 感觉有能力的世界, |
| 115 | of experiencing emotional strength, | 经历情感力量, |
| 116 | is directly tied to our capacity to both experience | 与我们的能力直接相关 |
| 117 | and move through those unpleasant feelings. | 穿过那些不愉快的感情 |
| 118 | Is it all eight at once? | 全部是八次吗? |
| 119 | No, it's not. | 不,这不是。 |
| 120 | It's one or a few at a time, | 一次一个还是几个 |
| 121 | like we can feel disappointment and anger at the same time. | 就像我们能同时感到失望和愤怒 |
| 122 | So, again, if you can experience and move through | 所以,再次,如果你能体验和移动 |
| 123 | those eight unpleasant feelings of sadness, shame, helplessness, | 那八种悲伤、羞愧、无助的感觉 |
| 124 | anger, vulnerability, embarrassment, disappointment, and frustration, | 愤怒、脆弱、尴尬、失望和挫折, |
| 125 | then you will begin to experience growing confidence and emotional strength. | 然后,你将开始经历 越来越大的信心和情感力量。 |
| 126 | And what do I mean by this move through? | 这是什么意思? |
| 127 | Well, neuroscientists suggest that when an emotional feeling gets triggered, | 神经科学家们建议 当情绪感动时 |
| 128 | that chemicals are released by our brain that flush through our bloodstream | 我们的大脑释放出化学物质 冲进我们的血液 |
| 129 | and they activate bodily sensations. | 并激活身体的感觉。 |
| 130 | It's sort of a biochemical rush and then flush. | 有点生化冲动 然后冲浪 |
| 131 | Let me translate. | 让我翻译一下。 |
| 132 | And this is super important. | 这很重要。 |
| 133 | What we feel emotionally is felt in the body first | 我们的情感是先在身体中感受到的 |
| 134 | as a bodily or physical sensation. | 身体上或身体上的感觉 |
| 135 | It doesn't feel good. | 这感觉不太好。 |
| 136 | Let me repeat that. | 让我重复一遍。 |
| 137 | What we feel emotionally is experienced in the body first | 我们的感情是先在身体中体验的 |
| 138 | as a bodily or physical sensation. | 身体上或身体上的感觉 |
| 139 | That's what we want to distract from. | 这就是我们要分散注意力的原因 |
| 140 | That's what we want to get away from. | 这就是我们想要摆脱的。 |
| 141 | It's not that we don't want to feel something emotionally. | 这并不是说我们不想有感情的感觉 |
| 142 | We absolutely do want to feel emotionally. | 我们确实想感受情感 |
| 143 | We want the whole range of feelings. | 我们要所有的感觉 |
| 144 | We just don't want the bodily sensations that let us know what we're feeling. | 我们只是不希望身体的感觉 告诉我们我们的感受。 |
| 145 | What unpleasant feelings might you be moving away from? | 什么样的不愉快的感情 你可能会离开? |
| 146 | What might be holding you back? | 是什么让你退缩了? |
| 147 | Stop and notice where you might experience it in your body. | 停下来,注意你身体里可能有什么感受 |
| 148 | And if there's a time where you ever said to yourself, | 如果你曾经对自己说过 |
| 149 | I never want to experience that again, | 我再也不想经历那种事了 |
| 150 | it's probably some of those feelings are ones to move towards, | 可能有些感觉是朝向 |
| 151 | to start to embrace. | 开始拥抱。 |
| 152 | For me, it was involved with that gut punch. | 对我来说,它与 肠道拳。 |
| 153 | Embarrassment was really difficult. | 尴尬是很难的。 |
| 154 | So was disappointment. | 失望也一样。 |
| 155 | And so was vulnerability. | 脆弱性也是如此。 |
| 156 | But let's get to the solution. | 但求解脱. |
| 157 | The solution has to do with riding the wave. | 解决之道与骑浪有关. |
| 158 | Remember that biochemical rush I mentioned a few moments ago? | 记得我刚才提到的生化热吗? |
| 159 | That biochemical rush we can think of as a wave. | 那种生化的冲动,我们可以想象成波浪。 |
| 160 | And when that wave gets fired off in the body, | 当那波在身体里被射掉时 |
| 161 | it lasts roughly 60 to 90 seconds, | 它大约持续60到90秒, |
| 162 | which means feelings are temporary. | 也就是说感情是暂时的 |
| 163 | So from the time it gets fired off in the brain | 因此,从它被炒掉的大脑 |
| 164 | and it goes through our bloodstream and then dissipates, | 它穿过我们的血液 然后消散 |
| 165 | 60 to 90 seconds. | 60秒到90秒. |
| 166 | You can handle 60 to 90 seconds, right? | 你能处理60到90秒,对吧? |
| 167 | Heck, that's less than half a song. | 这还不到半首 |
| 168 | All of us can do that. | 我们都能做到 |
| 169 | And if you think of a beach, let me draw a parallel. | 如果你想到一个海滩, 让我画一个平行。 |
| 170 | If you think of a beach, | 如果你想到海滩, |
| 171 | then as you walk along that shoreline, | 当你沿着海岸线走的时候 |
| 172 | what you'll notice is that the waves can come up tumultuously, | 你会发现,波浪会突然涌现 |
| 173 | they can come up moderately, they can come up mildly. | 他们可以温和地上来 他们可以温和地上来 |
| 174 | And if we're walking along that shoreline, | 如果我们沿着海岸线走 |
| 175 | we'll notice that the waves seem to just hang and linger for a moment | 我们会注意到,浪似乎只是 挂和停留片刻 |
| 176 | before they subside. | 在他们屈服之前 |
| 177 | And you know what? | 你知道吗? |
| 178 | That's also true for our feelings. | 我们的感情也是这样 |
| 179 | They can come up tumultuously, moderately, mildly, | 它们会突如其来的 中度的 轻度的 |
| 180 | and they seem to linger or hang for a moment. | 他们似乎停留或挂了一会儿。 |
| 181 | And then they always subside. | 然后他们总是退缩。 |
| 182 | That's the beauty of it. | 这就是它的美丽。 |
| 183 | Always subside. | 总是退缩。 |
| 184 | Is it one wave? | 是一波吗? |
| 185 | No, it's not. | 不,这不是。 |
| 186 | It's more than one wave. | 一波多罗. |
| 187 | Anytime you think about the same memory, | 每当你想起同样的记忆, |
| 188 | it's going to fire off that same approximate wave. | 它会发射出相同的大致波。 |
| 189 | And grief, grief is waves of waves. | 悲伤,悲伤是波浪 |
| 190 | The feelings of anger and sadness and disappointment | 愤怒、悲伤和失望的感觉 |
| 191 | kind of all mixed together. | 有点混合在一起。 |
| 192 | Anybody who's experienced a significant loss knows this. | 任何经历了重大损失的人都知道这一点。 |
| 193 | Those waves can come up so tumultuously and unexpectedly or spontaneously, | 这些波浪会突如其来 出乎意料或自发地涌现出来 |
| 194 | and it's like we're just kind of left with them. | 就像我们跟他们一样 |
| 195 | And they will always subside. | 他们将永远退缩。 |
| 196 | So the thing, again, here for you to do | 所以事情,再次,在这里你做 |
| 197 | is to stay present to the experience, | 保持经验, |
| 198 | surf those 90 second waves, | 冲浪这90秒浪, |
| 199 | surf them any way you want, | 你想怎么冲就怎么冲 |
| 200 | and just let them ride out their course. | 让他们离开他们的航线 |
| 201 | In the moment, you'll feel centered, you'll feel calm, and you'll feel relief. | 此时会感到中心化,感到平静,感到宽慰. |
| 202 | Insights will follow. | 洞察力会随之而来. |
| 203 | And with consistent practice, | 和一致的做法, |
| 204 | you may even be able to unhook from old life stories. | 你甚至可以从旧生活故事中解脱出来 |
| 205 | I have been the joyful recipient of countless stories | 我曾经是无数故事的快乐收听者 |
| 206 | of individuals who have mended relationships, | 已修正关系的个人, |
| 207 | who have engaged in courageous conversations, | 他们进行了勇敢的对话, |
| 208 | who have pursued goals that they wanted to pursue. | 他们追求自己想要追求的目标。 |
| 209 | And the most important one, I think, | 而最重要的一个,我想, |
| 210 | is when people come back and tell me | 当人们回来告诉我 |
| 211 | that they feel so much more comfortable in their own skin. | 让他们在自己的皮肤中感觉更舒服 |
| 212 | That's the benefit. | 这就是好处。 |
| 213 | I thought when I was called boring was a low moment in my life. | 我以为当我被叫作无聊的时候 是我人生中一个低调的时刻 |
| 214 | It turns out that moment shifted me, | 事实证明那一刻改变了我 |
| 215 | and it's enabled me to shift countless thousands of lives. | 它使我能够改变无数人的生命。 |
| 216 | So the next time you experience unpleasant feelings, | 所以,下一次你经历不愉快的感情, |
| 217 | embrace them, join me in the excitement. | 拥抱他们,加入我的兴奋。 |
| 218 | Know that they are the path back to you being more fully you. | 知道他们是回到你更完整的道路吗? |
| 219 | Stay present. | 待在这里 |
| 220 | Stay fully present. | 保持完整的在场。 |
| 221 | Experience them. | 体验他们。 |
| 222 | Surf those waves. | 冲浪浪 |
| 223 | It won't take years. | 不须数年. |
| 224 | It won't even take a day. | 它甚至不会花一天。 |
| 225 | In fact, it will take just a moment. | 事实上,只需要一分钟。 |
| 226 | Start right now. | 现在开始 |
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