10 项很难学习但会永远有回报的技能（上）
字幕摘录
| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 0:00 | I have studied morning routines, journaling methods, the science of productivity. | 我研究了早晨的例行公事、期刊方法、生产力科学。 |
| 0:05 | It has taken me three years to figure out the perfect morning routine journaling method. | 我花了3年时间才想出 完美的早晨例行记账方法 |
| 0:09 | It takes me less than five minutes, less than five minutes. | 不到五分钟,不到五分钟 |
| 0:12 | Each prompt in the journaling method is backed by science. | 日记方法中的每个提示都有科学的支持. |
| 0:16 | It is designed to make your mindset more powerful. | 它的目的是使你的思维更加强大。 |
| 0:18 | It's designed to give you control. | 它的设计给你控制。 |
| 0:20 | It's designed to leverage the world's most powerful research around focus and around | 它旨在利用全世界最强大的研究 围绕焦点和周围 |
| 0:25 | happiness, and literally it takes you less than five minutes. | 幸福,实际上它需要不到五分钟。 |
| 0:29 | I'm going to walk you through step by step this week, the science behind each one of | 本周我要一步一步地走过去 每一个科学背后 |
| 0:33 | the prompts. | 电源。 |
展开字幕全文（1066 条）
| 序号 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | I have studied morning routines, journaling methods, the science of productivity. | 我研究了早晨的例行公事、期刊方法、生产力科学。 |
| 2 | It has taken me three years to figure out the perfect morning routine journaling method. | 我花了3年时间才想出 完美的早晨例行记账方法 |
| 3 | It takes me less than five minutes, less than five minutes. | 不到五分钟,不到五分钟 |
| 4 | Each prompt in the journaling method is backed by science. | 日记方法中的每个提示都有科学的支持. |
| 5 | It is designed to make your mindset more powerful. | 它的目的是使你的思维更加强大。 |
| 6 | It's designed to give you control. | 它的设计给你控制。 |
| 7 | It's designed to leverage the world's most powerful research around focus and around | 它旨在利用全世界最强大的研究 围绕焦点和周围 |
| 8 | happiness, and literally it takes you less than five minutes. | 幸福,实际上它需要不到五分钟。 |
| 9 | I'm going to walk you through step by step this week, the science behind each one of | 本周我要一步一步地走过去 每一个科学背后 |
| 10 | the prompts. | 电源。 |
| 11 | I invite you to print this out. | 我邀请你把这个打印出来 |
| 12 | I invite you to go to the Five Second Journal and look at the science, and I invite you | 请您到"五二"杂志社看科学 |
| 13 | to think about what's working for you so you can create a morning routine that really empowers | 想想什么对你有用 这样你就能创造出一个 真正赋予权力的早间程序 |
| 14 | your mindset, because I don't want you to wake up in the morning and immediately let | 你的心态,因为我不想你早上醒来 然后立刻让 |
| 15 | the world in. | 这个世界。 |
| 16 | You're under siege all day long from the world, from your friends, from your work, | 你被围困一整天 从世界, 从你的朋友, 从你的工作, |
| 17 | from your emails, from your social media, from the television, from the 24-hour news | 从你的电子邮件, 从你的社交媒体, 从电视, 从24小时新闻 |
| 18 | cycle. | 循环。 |
| 19 | Your dreams deserve 10 to 30 minutes in the morning for you to get your head on straight, | 你早上的梦想值得10到30分钟 让你头朝直上 |
| 20 | {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}让你自己专注于一些积极的事情 {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}让你想出如何建设 | |
| 21 | momentum and make progress on something that matters to you today, and for you to work | 在今天对你们很重要的事情上取得进展, |
| 22 | on building your deliberate way of thinking so that by doing so, you're going to reprogram | 建立你深思熟虑的方式 这样你就可以重新编程 |
| 23 | your default network in your brain so that your mind automatically starts filtering the | 大脑中默认的网络,以便你的思想自动开始过滤 |
| 24 | world in a way that works for you. | 以对你有用的方式 |
| 25 | That's why I'm teaching you this, because it's all building on the things you learned | 这就是为什么我教你这个, 因为这一切都建立在你学到的东西上 |
| 26 | in week one, on days one, two, three, four, and five, okay? | 在一周,在第1,2,3,4,和5天,好吗? |
| 27 | We're on day nine now. | 我们到了第九天了 |
| 28 | So the first prompt is very, very simple, and the first prompt is all about your mood. | 所以第一个提示非常非常简单,第一个提示都是关于你的心情的。 |
| 29 | So the second that you wake up, remember you're going to get out of bed. | 所以,第二,你醒来, 记得你会起床。 |
| 30 | If your alarm is your phone, you're going to turn the alarm off, but you're going to | 如果你的警报器是你的手机, 你会关闭警报器, 但你要去 |
| 31 | leave your phone where it is, and you're not going to take your phone with you to journal. | 把你的手机留在原处, 你不会把你的手机 与你一起到日记。 |
| 32 | Because I do not want you tempted to even look at it. | 因为我不想让你看 |
| 33 | I want your head clear. | 我要你清醒点 |
| 34 | I want you present. | 我要你来 |
| 35 | I want 10 lousy minutes for your dreams. | 我想给你10分钟的梦 |
| 36 | Don't your dreams deserve that? | 你的梦想不值得吗? |
| 37 | Doesn't your sanity and your happiness and your sense of control deserve 10 lousy minutes | 你的理智和幸福 以及你的控制力 不应该有10分钟 |
| 38 | in the morning? | 早上吗? |
| 39 | Of course it does. | 当然 |
| 40 | So the first thing I want you to think about is your mood, and the reason why I'm starting | 所以我要你考虑的第一件事 就是你的心情 以及我开始的原因 |
| 41 | with your mood is because there is tremendous research about your mood in the morning and | 你的心情是因为它有 大量的研究 你的心情在早晨和 |
| 42 | how the mood that you have in the morning and the energy level that you have can impact | 早晨的情绪和能量水平如何影响 |
| 43 | your confidence all day long. | 你整天充满信心 |
| 44 | It can impact your productivity all day long, and it's super important for you to do something | 它可以影响你的生产力 一整天, 它的超级重要性 你做一些事情 |
| 45 | first thing in the morning to get present to your mood and your energy, and then do | 第一件事在早晨得到礼物 你的心情和精力,然后做 |
| 46 | something intentional to boost it. | 某种有意刺激它的东西 |
| 47 | Because that will have an established, science-backed, proven impact on your productivity and your | 因为这会对你的生产力 和你的生产力 产生既定的 科学支持的 被证明的影响 |
| 48 | focus and your happiness all day long. | 专注和幸福 |
| 49 | So there's a very simple prompt at the top. | 所以上面有一个非常简单的提示. |
| 50 | It just is, how do I feel? | 只是,我感觉如何? |
| 51 | This is your inner compass. | 这是你的内在指南针。 |
| 52 | This is how you read your energy. | 这就是你如何读取你的能量。 |
| 53 | It's a little scale, much like a gas tank in a car, from empty to full. | 它是一个小尺度,很像汽车中的油箱,从空到满. |
| 54 | Depleted is empty, and full is energized. | 消耗是空的 充满了活力 |
| 55 | Me this morning, I woke up feeling meh. | 今早我醒来时感觉很舒服 |
| 56 | And then over here, you're going to explain why you feel this way. | 在这里,你会解释你为什么这样想。 |
| 57 | Now it's important to identify why you feel meh or why you feel energized and excited | 现在重要的是要找出你为什么觉得 meh 或者你为什么觉得兴奋和兴奋 |
| 58 | because it makes you present. | 因为它让你现身。 |
| 59 | You see, we're tuning you into your inner wisdom. | 你看,我们正在调整你的内在智慧。 |
| 60 | We are teaching you how to be present and mindful. | 我们教你们如何在座,如何记着。 |
| 61 | And even if, when you get present, you get present to something that's negative, we're | 即使,当你到场, 你得到的东西是负面的,我们 |
| 62 | teaching you how to turn it around. | 教汝转法轮. |
| 63 | See, negative isn't bad, it just is what it is. | 你看,负的不是坏的, 它只是它是什么。 |
| 64 | When you recognize that you woke up and you're feeling meh, which is how I felt this morning, | 当你意识到你醒了,你感觉我, 这就是我今天早上的感觉, |
| 65 | now that you're present to it, you've got the power to get deliberate and shift it. | 现在,你来到它, 你有力量 得到深思熟虑和转移它。 |
| 66 | So why did I wake up and go, meh, I'll tell you why. | 我为什么醒来就走了,我告诉你原因 |
| 67 | Because there was some woman in the room next to me who was awake at 4.15 this morning yapping | 因为隔壁有个女人 早上4点15分醒过来 |
| 68 | to the person next to her. | 她身边的人。 |
| 69 | They weren't, you know, doing anything that I hate hearing in a hotel room, other people | 他们不是,你知道,做任何事情 我讨厌听到在酒店房间,其他人 |
| 70 | through the wall. | 穿过墙 |
| 71 | If you know what I mean, I'm keeping this family friendly, but she was talking and talking | 如果你明白我的意思, 我保持这个家庭友好, 但她说话和说话 |
| 72 | and talking. | 和说话。 |
| 73 | And then I woke up again at 4.37 and I woke up again at 5.12 and I woke up again at 5.57 | 然后我在4点37分醒来 5点12分醒来 5点57分醒来 |
| 74 | and then I woke up again at 6.20 and then I just got up and then my alarm hadn't even | 6点20分我又醒了 然后就起床了 警报还没响 |
| 75 | gotten up yet. | 起床了吗? |
| 76 | And I was so annoyed. | 我非常烦恼 |
| 77 | And that's why it was like meh, because of this chick next to me in the hotel room. | 这就是为什么它就像meh, 因为旁边的一个小鸡我 在酒店的房间。 |
| 78 | I was so, that is actually the first thing that I said to Mandy. | 我是那么的,这其实是我对曼迪的第一句话。 |
| 79 | So I wrote down, I feel this way because I kept getting interrupted in my sleep and woken | 所以我写下来,我这样觉得 因为我一直被打断 我的睡眠和醒来 |
| 80 | up by this person and that bothered me. | 被这人所困扰 |
| 81 | And the other reason why I feel meh is my neck kind of hurts sleeping in so many hotel | 而另一个原因,我感觉 meh 是那种我的脖子疼 睡在这么多的酒店 |
| 82 | beds. | 床铺。 |
| 83 | It's been lousy for my 50 year old neck. | 我50岁那年的脖子很烂 |
| 84 | So now the next thing that you're going to do, how long did that take? | 那么,现在你接下来要做的事, 花了多久? |
| 85 | Five seconds, five seconds to circle this, five seconds to explain why. | 5秒,5秒 绕这个圈,5秒 解释为什么。 |
| 86 | Now the next one, most important, to feel more energized, I can't. | 现在,下一个,最重要的是, 感觉更活力,我不能。 |
| 87 | We want to boost your mood in the morning. | 我们想在早上增加你的心情。 |
| 88 | Takes five seconds to think about it. | 以五时思惟. |
| 89 | So I wrote down, I'm going to get up and exercise. | 所以我写了下来,我要起来锻炼。 |
| 90 | So my business partner, Mandy and I, we schlepped our way to a soul cycle class, a 45 minute | 所以,我的生意伙伴,曼迪和我, 我们拼命地走进一个灵魂循环课程, 45分钟 |
| 91 | spin class here. | 旋转课在这里。 |
| 92 | It was, I'm not in spin shape. | 是,我不是在旋转形状。 |
| 93 | That's what I learned this morning. | 今晨所学. |
| 94 | But let me tell you, it boosted my energy. | 但是,让我告诉你, 它提高了我的能量。 |
| 95 | So in just those three, five second questions, I have leveraged very profound and powerful | 因此,在这三个,五个第二个问题中, 我利用了非常深刻和强大的 |
| 96 | science around mood to take control of my mindset. | 科学可以控制我的心态 |
| 97 | I could have easily in my old life woken up, been interrupted by some woman next door to | 我本可以轻而易举地醒来 被隔壁的女人打断 |
| 98 | me in the hotel all night long, been annoyed about it, carried that like, oh, I didn't | 我整晚都在酒店里,很烦恼, 带着它,就像,哦,我没有 |
| 99 | get enough sleep all through my entire day, all through my entire day. | 我一整天都睡够了 一整天都睡够了 |
| 100 | How many of you have done that? | 你们有多少人做过这种事? |
| 101 | You got a lousy night's sleep or somebody interrupted you when you're sleeping in a | 你有一个糟糕的夜晚的睡眠 或者有人打断你 当你睡在一个 |
| 102 | hotel like what happened to me or the dog barked and had to go out at three o'clock | 酒店就像发生在我身上或者狗叫 不得不在三点钟方向出去 |
| 103 | in the morning or maybe one of your kids came home after a night of partying and then | 早上,或者也许你的一个孩子 回家过一个晚上的聚会,然后 |
| 104 | you were upset and you had to deal with that. | 你心烦意乱,你不得不处理。 |
| 105 | Then you went back. | 然后你们回去了 |
| 106 | And so you wake up and your mood is lousy. | 所以你醒来,你的心情很糟糕。 |
| 107 | And then all day long, you basically make one moment where you wake up in a bad mood | 然后一整天,你基本上 使一分钟,你醒来 在不良的心情 |
| 108 | become a bad day. | 变成一个糟糕的一天。 |
| 109 | You're not going to do that anymore. | 你不会再这么做了 |
| 110 | That's the power of a mindset reset. | 这就是思想重现的力量。 |
| 111 | And that's why you're going to start with mood when you wake up. | 这也是你醒来后要从心情开始的原因. |
| 112 | OK, so, you know, this is kind of my brand of advice. | OK,所以,你知道,这是我的建议。 |
| 113 | It's got to be incredibly stupid on the surface. | 表面肯定很愚蠢 简直太蠢了 |
| 114 | It's got to be so simple. | 得如是简. |
| 115 | It's really implausible that it works. | 其功用真不可思议. |
| 116 | And once you start unpacking it, it has to have a crazy bananas amount of scientific | 一旦你开始拆开它, 它必须有一个疯狂的香蕉数量科学 |
| 117 | proof and real life proof in people's lives to prove why it works. | 证明和真实生活证明 在人们的生活中 证明它为什么工作。 |
| 118 | So I'll tell you the story first behind the high five habit because I did not set out | 所以,我首先告诉你 背后的故事 五高的习惯 因为我没有出发 |
| 119 | and go like, OK, I've written the five second rule book. | 我写了第二本规则书 |
| 120 | I need to come up with another five. | 我得再想出五个 |
| 121 | I have been toiling away with what book to write for nearly five years. | 近五年来我一直在忙于写什么书 |
| 122 | So it's been five years since I've had a book in print. | 故以印书五载. |
| 123 | And I had this random morning where there's a lot going on in my life. | 我有一个随机的早晨 我的生活里有很多事情 |
| 124 | I'm not going to get into it because it's a boring story. | 我不会进入它,因为它是一个无聊的故事。 |
| 125 | But I was just having a really hard time in my life. | 但是,我只是有一个真正的困难 我的生活。 |
| 126 | And I woke up, got out of bed, I made my bed like I always do, walked into the bathroom, | 我醒来,从床上下来, 我做了我的床 像往常一样,走进浴室, |
| 127 | I'm standing there brushing my teeth. | 我站在那里刷牙。 |
| 128 | And I catch my reflection in the mirror. | 我在镜子里看到自己的反光 |
| 129 | And my first thought is, God, you look like hell. | 我的第一个想法是,上帝,你看起来像地狱。 |
| 130 | Seriously. | 说真的 |
| 131 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 132 | And I know women in particular can relate to this, but what a lot of people don't realize | 我特别知道女人可以参与其中 但很多人不知道 |
| 133 | is you guys are incredibly hard on yourselves too. | 你们自己也很难过 |
| 134 | And so as I go, God, you look like hell, I start then cataloging all of the things that | 我走了,上帝,你看起来像地狱, 我开始编目所有的东西 |
| 135 | are wrong with my appearance. | 我的外表有问题 |
| 136 | I'm like, your gray hair is coming in, you've got stripes on your neck, one of your boobs | 你的灰色头发要进来了 你脖子上有条纹 你的胸部之一 |
| 137 | is lower than the other, you look exhausted. | 比别人还低,你看起来很疲惫 |
| 138 | And then as soon as you have a negative thought or a self-criticism, it's sort of like lint | 当你有负面的想法或自我批评, 它有点像lint |
| 139 | in a dryer. | 在一个烘干机。 |
| 140 | Once you start collecting it, it just keeps on collecting it. | 一旦你开始收集它, 它只是继续收集它。 |
| 141 | So now I'm thinking not about how horrible I look or how tired I look, now I start thinking | 所以现在我想的不是 我看起来有多可怕 或我看起来有多累 现在我开始想 |
| 142 | about all the stuff I need to do. | 关于所有我需要做的事情。 |
| 143 | I start going, oh my gosh, I got up a little too late and I've got a Zoom call in eight | 我开始走,哦,我的天哪, 我起床有点太迟,我有一个缩放呼叫在八 |
| 144 | minutes, I don't even have a bra on yet, the dog needs to be walked. | 几分钟,我连胸罩都没有, 狗需要步行。 |
| 145 | And I could feel my energy going down. | 我能感觉到我的能量正在下降。 |
| 146 | Like I just felt the weight of the world on my shoulders, overwhelmed, uncertain. | 就像我刚刚感觉到世界的重量 在我的肩膀, 不堪重负,不确定。 |
| 147 | It doesn't even matter what was going on in my life at that time because I think it's | 那时我生命中发生的事不重要 因为我觉得 |
| 148 | a universal feeling to feel overwhelmed by your life at times. | 一种普世的感觉 感觉被你的人生所压抑 有时。 |
| 149 | And so here I am, a motivational speaker, unmotivated, uncaffeinated, no bra on, standing | 因此,我在这里, 一个激励性演讲者, 没有动机, 没有咖啡, 没有胸罩,站着 |
| 150 | there in my underwear with my dog at my feet. | 在我的内裤里,我的狗在我的脚。 |
| 151 | I don't know what came over me, but as cheesy as it sounds, I just raised my hand and gave | 我不知道我怎么了, 但俗气的声音,我只是举起手来 |
| 152 | the tired, haggard woman in the mirror a high five. | 厌倦的老妇人在镜子中击掌。 |
| 153 | And it didn't change my life like right then and there, but something shifted. | 它并没有改变我的生活 像当时和那里, 但有些东西改变了。 |
| 154 | Like I felt a little lighter. | 感觉有点轻 |
| 155 | I felt like I wasn't alone. | 我觉得我不是一个人 |
| 156 | I felt like, okay, you know, this moment in your life is hard, but you can do this, Mel. | 我觉得,好吧,你知道,这一刻 你的生活是艰难的, 但你可以做到这一点,梅尔。 |
| 157 | And I went on with my day. | 我继续我的一天。 |
| 158 | So the second day I woke up, and this is when things started to really kind of churn in | 第二天我醒来 事情开始变得很复杂 |
| 159 | my mind. | 我脑子里想的 |
| 160 | The first thing that I noticed was this. | 我发现的第一件事就是这个 |
| 161 | So I wake up, Louis, and I make my bed. | 所以我醒来,路易斯,我做了我的床。 |
| 162 | And I realized I was looking forward to that moment in the mirror where I was going to | 我意识到我期待着在镜子中的那一刻 我打算在那里 |
| 163 | see myself. | 看见我自己。 |
| 164 | Now look, I'm 52 years old. | 听着,我52岁了 |
| 165 | I will probably have a hot flash during the middle of this interview at some point. | 我可能会有一个热闪光 在中间 这次采访的某个时候。 |
| 166 | I'm a lot older than you. | 我比你年纪大很多 |
| 167 | Just don't eat lobster. | 别吃龙虾 |
| 168 | Oh yeah, I know. | 哦,对,我知道。 |
| 169 | I had a really allergic reaction the last time we were together, wow. | 上次我们在一起的时候我反应很过敏 |
| 170 | But I have spent the first 45 years of my life either criticizing the woman in the mirror | 但我在头45年里 在镜子里批评那个女人 |
| 171 | or ignoring her. | 或无视她。 |
| 172 | And this was the first time that I could remember that I was actually looking forward to seeing | 这是第一次,我记得 我其实期待看到 |
| 173 | myself. | 我个人 |
| 174 | Sort of like, you know, when I was coming here today, you and I are very good friends. | 有点像,你知道, 当我今天来这里, 你和我是非常好的朋友。 |
| 175 | As I was walking in the building, I'm feeling excited to see you. | 当我走在大楼里, 我感到兴奋看到你。 |
| 176 | And it wasn't like I was feeling excited to see myself. | 看见自己也不觉得兴奋 |
| 177 | Like I'm not like, yeah, because I got a lot of crap going on in my life. | 像我不喜欢,是的, 因为我有很多废话在我的生活。 |
| 178 | But I felt a little bit like I'm about to see a friend. | 但我感觉有点像即将见到朋友 |
| 179 | And so that second morning, I high-fived myself again. | 于是第二天早上,我又打了5枪 |
| 180 | And again, I feel something shift. | 再说一遍,我感觉有些变化 |
| 181 | I feel just a little lightness in the mood, and I go on with my day. | 我觉得心情有点淡淡,我继续我的一天。 |
| 182 | So the third morning, I do it again. | 所以,在第三个早晨,我再次这样做。 |
| 183 | And again, like lightness, and so I keep doing it, keep doing it a couple of weeks go by. | 再一次,像光线, 所以我继续做, 继续做几个星期。 |
| 184 | And now I'm starting to feel a little bit of momentum. | 现在,我开始感受到一点动力。 |
| 185 | And I'm really enjoying it. | 我真的很喜欢 |
| 186 | I have no idea what the hell is going on. | 我不知道这到底是怎么回事 |
| 187 | I haven't even done this in front of my husband, Chris, yet, because let's be honest, standing | 我还没在我丈夫克里斯面前这么做过 因为让我们诚实地站着 |
| 188 | in front of a mirror. | 在镜子前。 |
| 189 | High-fiving yourself. | 高足自养. |
| 190 | Yeah, like, come on. | 是啊,喜欢,来吧。 |
| 191 | How pathetic does it get? | 这有多可悲? |
| 192 | You're like, it's really, you're like that bad? | 你就像,这是真的, 你像那么糟糕? |
| 193 | So I snap a photo of myself. | 所以我拍了一张我自己的照片。 |
| 194 | I've got my retainer in. | 我订了位子 |
| 195 | I got bedhead. | 我有床头。 |
| 196 | Like, I'm not looking glamorous. | 喜欢,我没有看起来迷人。 |
| 197 | I did not expect this to be the photo that would ignite a movement. | 我没想到照片会点燃运动 |
| 198 | And within an hour, I posted on my story on Instagram, within an hour, at least 100 people | 一小时后,我在Instagram上发布了我的故事 一个小时内,至少100人 |
| 199 | tagged me. | 标记我。 |
| 200 | All over the world, people high-fiving the mirror with their kids, people on a submarine | 全世界都有人带着孩子 和潜水艇上的人一起高举镜子 |
| 201 | high-fiving it in the military, people MMA, like just, and I thought, okay, wait a minute. | 在军队中高飞,人们MMA, 像公正,我想,好吧,等一下。 |
| 202 | Maybe I'm not the only one that needs a little boost in the morning. | 或许我并非唯一一个早上需要一点刺激的人 |
| 203 | Maybe I'm not the only one who feels alone. | 也许我不是唯一觉得孤独的人 |
| 204 | Maybe I'm not the only one that is missing a sense of encouragement and control and confidence | 也许我不是唯一一个 缺少鼓励感 控制感和信心的人 |
| 205 | in an overwhelming moment in my life. | 在我的生命中,一个压倒性的时刻。 |
| 206 | Maybe there's something here. | 也许这里有东西 |
| 207 | And then the messages started to come in, whoa, Mel, like, I have been using this for | 然后留言开始传来,哇,梅尔,喜欢,我一直用这个 |
| 208 | five days. | 5天时间。 |
| 209 | This woman wrote to us, Louis, she's had body dysmorphia for 20 years, has not been able | 这个女人写信给我们 路易斯 她20年来身体有畸形症 |
| 210 | to look at herself in the mirror. | 在镜子里看着自己 |
| 211 | Five days of doing this high-five, and she said, I can look at myself, and I even see | 5天来,她对我说,我可以看着自己,我甚至看到 |
| 212 | beyond the body, I see the person, and I can grin. | 在身体之外,我看到这个人,我可以笑。 |
| 213 | We had a woman who wrote to us who said that she was in a domestic violence shelter. | 我们有一个女人写信给我们,说她住在一个家庭暴力收容所。 |
| 214 | She had escaped a very abusive relationship. | 她逃脱了一段非常虐待性的关系。 |
| 215 | 她看到我在朋友Jamie Kerm Lima的活动上说话 | |
| 216 | She started doing the high-five thing. | 她开始做 击掌的事情。 |
| 217 | She DMs us, and she says that, you know, I have childhood trauma. | 她说,你知道,我有童年创伤。 |
| 218 | I've just been in a physically abusive relationship. | 我只是在身体虐待的关系。 |
| 219 | I've lost everything. | 我失去了一切。 我失去了一切。 |
| 220 | I'm in a domestic violence shelter. | 我在一个家庭暴力收容所 |
| 221 | What this high-five in the mirror is teaching me is that I still have myself. | 镜中这五击法教我的是,我还有自己. |
| 222 | And so that was when I said, I got to figure out what's going on. | 于是我说,我得弄清楚发生了什么。 |
| 223 | And I started to unpack the research. | 我开始整理研究资料。 |
| 224 | And the research around this simple ritual, I love that you called it a ritual because | 有关这个简单的仪式的研究, 我喜欢你称之为仪式,因为 |
| 225 | I want people to habit stack this with brushing their teeth. | 我要人们习惯用刷牙来刷牙 |
| 226 | This is so life-changing. | 这是如此改变生活。 |
| 227 | It's so simple. | 很简单 |
| 228 | The science here is like, you can't believe it. | 这里的科学就像,你不能相信它。 |
| 229 | And once I unpack it, you're going to be like, I can't believe how cool this thing is. | 一旦我拆开它, 你会像, 我不敢相信 这东西有多酷。 |
| 230 | So what's the science say? | 科学怎么说? |
| 231 | OK, so the science. | 好吧,所以科学。 |
| 232 | Let's start with the first thing. | 先标第一义. |
| 233 | So the first thing is that when you first try it, OK, you will not be able to raise | 所以,第一件事是 当你第一次尝试它,OK, 你将无法抚养 |
| 234 | your hand and high-five yourself and be like, you suck, Mel, or today's going to be terrible. | 你的手和击掌,你自己 喜欢,你吸,梅尔,否则今天将是可怕的。 |
| 235 | And there's a reason for that. | 则有因缘. |
| 236 | And the reason is that for your entire life, you have given other people high-fives. | 原因是你一生 都给别人注射过五分 |
| 237 | So when you give a high-five or you receive one, what is a high-five? | 所以当施一击五击或受一击时,何谓一击五击? |
| 238 | Just the gestural. | 只是个胃部的 |
| 239 | And what does this communicate if we do this to each other and we high-five? | 如果我们这样对彼此 和我们击掌,这有什么关系? |
| 240 | Nice job, good work, you're doing amazing. | 干得漂亮 干得漂亮 干得漂亮 |
| 241 | Keep it up. | 继续 |
| 242 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 243 | I believe in you. | 我相信你们 |
| 244 | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| 245 | Let's go. | 我们走吧。 |
| 246 | If you blow a shot and you got to get back in the game, a high-five is like, shake it | 如果你打了一枪,你必须回到比赛, 一个击掌就像,摇动它 |
| 247 | off. | 关闭。 |
| 248 | You can win. | 你可以赢 |
| 249 | And so all of that lifetime of high-fiving other people and the messaging associated | 所以所有的生活 高血压的其他人 和消息相关 |
| 250 | with it is programmed right here in your subconscious brain. | 在你的潜意识大脑里 |
| 251 | There's a field of study called neurobics, which is about... | 有个研究领域叫神经病学,也就是... |
| 252 | Neurobics. | 神经病。 |
| 253 | I didn't make that up. | 不是我编的 |
| 254 | It's interesting. | 这很有趣。 |
| 255 | Physical movement plus new neurological activity. | 身体运动加上新的神经活动. |
| 256 | When you marry an unexpected physical movement with new neurological activity, it's the fastest | 当你嫁给一个有新神经运动的意外身体运动时, 速度最快 |
| 257 | way to forge new neural pathways in your brain. | 如何在你的大脑中构建新的神经途径。 |
| 258 | We know the example, you've covered this on your show, of brushing with the wrong hand | 我们知道这个例子,你在你的节目上已经报道了, 用错误的手刷 |
| 259 | and thinking positive thoughts. | 并思考积极的想法。 |
| 260 | And the reason why that works is because when you're brushing with the wrong hand, it's | 原因是当你用错手时 |
| 261 | unexpected, your brain doesn't expect it, so instead of drifting off about the fact | 没想到,你的大脑没有预料到, 所以不要漂浮下来的事实 |
| 262 | that you need to walk the dog, you have to focus, so your prefrontal cortex is engaged. | 你需要走狗, 你必须集中精力, 所以你的前额皮层是订婚。 |
| 263 | You're not used to high-fiving your own reflection, so it's an unexpected physical movement that | 你并不习惯于高压反射 所以这是意外的物理运动 |
| 264 | then activates all of the positive programming in your subconscious. | 然后激活你潜意识中的所有正编程. |
| 265 | So when you raise your hand and you high-five your tired self, Lewis, what happens is all | 所以,当你举起手来,你击掌 你疲倦的自己,刘易斯,会发生的一切 |
| 266 | of the messaging with this, the high-five, I believe in you, I love you, I celebrate | 我信你 我爱你 我庆祝 |
| 267 | you, you got this, keep going, come on. | 你,你有这个,继续,来吧。 |
| 268 | It actually fuses with your freaking reflection. | 它实际上与你的反射。 |
| 269 | It's impossible to criticize yourself. | 批评自己是不可能的. |
| 270 | Your brain won't allow it because it's not wired that way when you're making that motion. | 你的大脑不会允许它,因为当你做这个动作时 它不会有线。 |
| 271 | Isn't that crazy? | 是不是疯了? |
| 272 | It's hard to say, you suck, you don't matter in anything, it's hard to, yeah. | 这很难说,你吸,你无关紧要 任何事情,这是很难,是的。 |
| 273 | You can't, you can't. | 你不能,你不能这样做。 |
| 274 | And so this lifetime of positive subconscious programming associated with high-fiving other | 因此,这一辈子 积极的潜意识编程 与高活性其他 |
| 275 | people gets fused with your own reflection in this ritual. | 人们被你在这个仪式中的反射所融合 |
| 276 | That's just the beginning, okay? | 这只是开始,好吗? |
| 277 | That's just the beginning. | 这只是开始。 |
| 278 | The second thing that starts to happen that's really interesting, so, you know, we've had | 第二件事开始发生, 很有趣,所以,你知道,我们已经 |
| 279 | a ton of people do this, obviously, around the world. | 显然,全世界有很多人这样做。 |
| 280 | Super easy idea. | 超级简单的想法。 |
| 281 | It's spreading around the world. | 传遍天下. |
| 282 | We start interviewing people about what's going on, and this is what we notice. | 我们开始采访人们 有关发生了什么, 这是我们注意到的。 |
| 283 | We notice that one of two things happen when you first try this. | 我们注意到你第一次尝试的时候 有两件事发生 |
| 284 | So here's how I want everybody to try it. | 所以我希望大家试试看 |
| 285 | You're going to go into the bathroom and, you know, do it before or after you brush | 你要去厕所,你知道的, 在你刷之前或之后做 |
| 286 | your teeth, and that's important because I want you to make this a ritual that's part | 你的牙齿,这很重要 因为我希望你把这作为仪式的一部分 |
| 287 | of your morning routine. | 你早上的节目。 |
| 288 | And so we need to stack it with something you already do. | 所以我们需要堆上一些你已经做的事。 |
| 289 | And you're going to stand there for a minute, and I want you to look at yourself. | 你会站在那里一分钟, 我要你看看自己。 |
| 290 | Now that, right along, most of us don't do. | 现在,我们大多数人不这样做。 |
| 291 | Look at yourself. | 观自在身. |
| 292 | And I want you to just think about the day ahead. | 我要你考虑一下未来的一天 |
| 293 | This is based on more research. | 这是基于更多的研究。 |
| 294 | So recent studies show, from the University of Florida, that if you take just a minute | 所以最近的研究表明,从佛罗里达大学, 如果你只需要一分钟 |
| 295 | and you set an intention about how the day is going to go, about who you're going to | 你设定了一个打算 关于一天将如何去, 你要去谁 |
| 296 | be, how you're going to show up, what's the one thing that kind of matters to you to really | 你将如何出现,什么是最重要的事情 对你真正的 |
| 297 | make progress on? | 进展? |
| 298 | If you just kind of set that intention, who am I going to be today? | 如果你只是设定了那种意图, 我将是谁今天? |
| 299 | How am I going to show up today? | 我今如何现身. |
| 300 | Even if it's a hard day, how are you going to show up? | 今虽艰困,何以现身? |
| 301 | And then you raise your hand and you seal it. | 然后举手封印. |
| 302 | Research shows just setting the intention alone changes your mood. | 研究表明,仅仅设定意图 改变你的心情。 |
| 303 | It boosts your productivity. | 它能提高你的生产力。 |
| 304 | It increases your ability to make an impact on other people. | 它能增强你的能力 影响别人。 |
| 305 | And so when you seal it with this high five, it becomes this ritual of setting an intention | 所以当你用这支五重枪封住它 就会变成一种设定意图的仪式 |
| 306 | for the day and also silencing the critic and reprogramming the default setting about | 并重编默认设置 |
| 307 | how you see yourself, whether or not you believe in yourself. | 你如何看待自己, 不管你是否相信自己。 |
| 308 | And you leave that bathroom feeling like the wind is at your back. | 你离开浴室 感觉就像风在你身后。 |
| 309 | Now, when people do this for the first time, so you're going to stand there tomorrow and | 现在,当人们第一次这样做, 所以你要站在那里明天, |
| 310 | you're going to go, okay, Mel Robinson, Louis, sitting here, brush my teeth. | 你要去,好吧,梅尔・罗宾逊,路易斯, 坐在这里,刷我的牙。 |
| 311 | Okay, this is stupid. | 好吧,这是愚蠢的。 |
| 312 | You're going to just start rejecting it, I guarantee you. | 我保证你会拒绝的 |
| 313 | This is the coolest stuff you're going to have the biggest resistance to. | 这是最酷的东西 你会有最大的抵抗力。 |
| 314 | And so for those of you that just raise your hand and do it, you're going to immediately | 所以对于你们这些刚举起手来的人来说 你们会立刻 |
| 315 | be like, why have I not been doing this? | 为什么我没有这样做? |
| 316 | It feels good to be encouraged and supported. | 受到鼓励和支持是件好事。 |
| 317 | To high five yourself. | 亲自击掌 |
| 318 | Yes. | 对 |
| 319 | Yeah, yeah. | 对 对 |
| 320 | Why have I not had my own back? | 为什么我没有自己的背? |
| 321 | Why do I stand here and criticize myself? | 为什么我站在这里批评自己? |
| 322 | Why do I allow this moment every single morning to be a moment where life takes over and I | 为什么我让这个瞬间 每一天早上 成为生命重现的时刻 我 |
| 323 | drift into autopilot? | 漂移到自动驾驶舱? |
| 324 | Why am I not taking this moment for me to build a partnership with myself? | 为什么我不用这一刻来与自己建立伙伴关系? |
| 325 | The second group of people, and this is the larger group, resisted. | 第二组人,这是更大的群体, 抵抗。 |
| 326 | And this is really interesting. | 这真的很有趣。 |
| 327 | And the reason why you resisted and the reason why it feels weird is because you believe | 你反抗的原因 感觉怪怪的 是因为你相信 |
| 328 | you're not worthy of support or celebration. | 你不值得支持或庆祝 |
| 329 | From yourself or from others? | 从你自己还是从其他人? |
| 330 | Period. | 期间。 |
| 331 | Wow. | 珃 |
| 332 | Why do we think we're not worthy of celebration? | 为什么我们不值得庆祝? |
| 333 | Well, for people that grew up in a chaotic, violent, or whatever household, it was your | 对于在混乱、暴力或任何家庭里长大的人来说 是你的 |
| 334 | lived experience. | 活的经验。 |
| 335 | I think that for many of us, we look back on our lives and the cognitive negative bias | 我认为,对我们许多人来说,我们回顾我们的生活和认知上的负面偏见 |
| 336 | has its focus on the things that went wrong. | 专注于出错的事 |
| 337 | And so you begin to tell yourself a story about your life that is basically a pyramid | 所以你开始告诉自己一个关于你生活的故事 基本上是一个金字塔 |
| 338 | of all the things that you regret, of all the things that you wish had done over, of | 所有的事情,你后悔, 所有的事情,你希望做的, |
| 339 | all the things that you don't like about yourself. | 所有你不喜欢的事情 |
| 340 | And so you drag that with you into the bathroom every morning and you stare at the mirror | 你每天早上把那个拖进浴室 看着镜子 |
| 341 | and you see somebody that has screwed up. | 你看见有人搞砸了。 |
| 342 | You see somebody who's not where you're meant to be. | 你看到有人 谁不是你该去的地方。 |
| 343 | You see somebody who doesn't have the number on the scale or the car that you wanted or | 你看到有人谁没有 号码在秤上 或汽车你想要的, |
| 344 | the job that you had hoped for or the relationship that you had always dreamed about. | 你所希望的工作 或者你一直梦想的关系 |
| 345 | And so standing there, you believe you're not worthy of support or celebration. | 所以站在那里 你相信自己不值得支持或庆祝 |
| 346 | And it's this deep belief. | 则此深信. |
| 347 | We talk a lot in the personal development space of, oh, I'm not good enough. | 我们在个人发展空间里谈了很多, 哦,我不够好。 |
| 348 | I actually think that's the polite thing that people say. | 其实我认为这是人们所说的礼貌。 |
| 349 | I believe that people have a much more horrible way of talking to themselves. | 我相信,人们有 更可怕的方式 对自己说话。 |
| 350 | Like what? | 比如说? |
| 351 | I can't say it on TV, but I can say it on the internet. | 我不能在电视上说, 但我可以在互联网上说。 |
| 352 | I'm a piece of shit. | 我是一块狗屎。 |
| 353 | I'm worthless. | 我没用 |
| 354 | No one will ever love me. | 没人会爱我 |
| 355 | I screwed up my life. | 我毁了我的生活。 |
| 356 | I'm a failure. | 我是一个失败者。 |
| 357 | I'll never amount to anything. | 我永远不会变成任何东西。 |
| 358 | It's too late. | 太迟了 |
| 359 | I'm a bad person. | 我是一个坏人。 |
| 360 | Like I think people actually say this to themselves. | 就像我想人们会对自己说 |
| 361 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 362 | And they say it over and over again. | 他们一遍又一遍地说 |
| 363 | Yes. | 对 |
| 364 | Daily. | 每日报. |
| 365 | Yes. | 对 |
| 366 | And just like ruts on a dirt road, it starts to wear in your brain and it becomes the familiar | 就像泥路上的露丝一样 它开始穿在你的大脑里 变得熟悉 |
| 367 | path and so you stand in front of the mirror. | 你站在镜子前 |
| 368 | And I'm telling you, raise your hand and let all that positive programming you've given | 我告诉你,举起手来 让所有你给出的积极编程 |
| 369 | to everybody else. | 给其他人 |
| 370 | We are amazing at celebrating everybody else. | 我们为其他人庆祝是惊人的。 |
| 371 | We cheer for our favorite sports teams. | 我们为我们最喜欢的体育队欢呼 |
| 372 | We buy tickets to our favorite musicians. | 我们为我们最爱的音乐家买票 |
| 373 | We throw birthday parties for people. | 我们为人们举办生日派对 |
| 374 | We take on extra work for our colleagues. | 我们为我们的同事承担额外工作。 |
| 375 | We help our family members out and our friends out. | 我们帮我们的家人和朋友 |
| 376 | But when it comes to supporting ourselves, we don't know how to do it. | 但是当涉及到支持自己的时候,我们不知道如何做到. |
| 377 | In fact, there's a lot of people that think it's selfish to put yourself first or that | 事实上,很多人认为 把自己放在第一位是自私的 |
| 378 | you're arrogant if you do. | 如果你这样做,你是傲慢的。 |
| 379 | I'm here to tell you, it is essential to your well-being, to your fulfillment, to your happiness, | 我是来告诉你的 这对你的福祉、成就和幸福至关重要 |
| 380 | all of it. | 所有这一切。 |
| 381 | So if you're feeling resistance, you're either going to feel it because you already have | 所以,如果你感到抵抗, 你要么会感觉到它 因为你已经 |
| 382 | a deep story that you don't deserve it because of your track record, your past, because of | 一个深层的故事,你不值得它 因为你的成绩,你的过去,因为 |
| 383 | what's happening in your life, or you're going to feel resistance because you have | 生命中发生的一切, 或者你会感到反抗 因为你有 |
| 384 | been trained to believe that you only deserve that kind of stuff when you're winning. | 被训练来相信 你只有在你赢的时候才配得上这种东西 |
| 385 | Like if I don't have that car, I don't get the high five. | 如果我没有那辆车,我就不会得到击掌。 |
| 386 | If I didn't get that promotion, I didn't deserve it. | 如果我没有得到那份晋升,我不应该得到这份晋升. |
| 387 | If I am not in a loving relationship, I don't deserve to be celebrated because I'm not actually | 如果我没有恋爱关系,我不配被庆祝 因为我其实不是 |
| 388 | achieving or doing the things that warrant that. | 实现或做那些值得做的事。 |
| 389 | I'm here to tell you, I'm on a mission to make every human being realize that if you | 我是来告诉你 我的任务是让每个人意识到 如果你 |
| 390 | wake up in the morning and you're breathing and you're standing in front of that mirror | 早上醒来,你在呼吸,你站在镜子前 |
| 391 | and you have survived the stuff you have survived and you are still waking up and trying to | 你活下来了 你仍然醒过来 试图 |
| 392 | do better, you not only deserve a high five, you need it because what we also know based | 做更好,你不仅值得一个击掌,你需要它,因为我们同样知道基于 |
| 393 | on the research is that empowerment, support, kindness, love, celebration, it is the single | 研究是,赋予权力,支持,善待,爱,庆祝,这是唯一的 |
| 394 | most motivating force on the planet. | 地球上最有动力的力量 |
| 395 | Tough love is a bunch of baloney. | 坚硬的爱是一堆胡言乱语 |
| 396 | What really fuels people, particularly when you're going through a challenge, is feeling | 真正能激起人们 特别是当你面临挑战的时候 |
| 397 | celebrated, seen, and supported, and the research bears it out. | 庆祝、观看和支持,研究也证实了这一点。 |
| 398 | Yeah, I can think of the times when I was on sports teams where I had great, loving, | 是的,我可以想到 当我在体育队 我曾经有伟大的,爱, |
| 399 | encouraging coaches. | 鼓励教练。 |
| 400 | It made me want to work harder from a more energized place, an abundant energy, but when | 这让我更想工作 从一个更充满活力的地方, 丰富的能量,但何时 |
| 401 | I had the coaches that would just degrade you and put you down and call you names in | 我让导师只会贬低你,把你放下来,叫你们进来 |
| 402 | front of your teammates and make you feel bad, it would drive me to try to be better, | 在你的队友面前 让你觉得很不舒服 这会促使我努力变得更好 |
| 403 | but it was always harder, and I never felt satisfied, I never felt fulfilled. | 但它总是更难, 我从来没有感到满足, 我从来没有感到满足。 |
| 404 | I always felt like even when I accomplished something, it still wasn't good enough, and | 我总是觉得,即使我完成了一些事情, 它仍然不够好, |
| 405 | then I repeat that pattern, like, okay, I'm going to accomplish, but it's not enough to | 然后,我重复这个模式, 像,好吧,我要去完成, 但还不够 |
| 406 | feel loved, and so let me keep accomplishing in order to feel loved, but I still don't | 感觉被爱,所以让我继续完成 以感受被爱,但我还是不 |
| 407 | love myself because it's not good enough, so let me go for the next thing. | 爱自己因为不够好,所以让我去做下一件事. |
| 408 | Yeah, exactly. | 没错 |
| 409 | It's funny because I have a photo on my phone that my therapist told me to do this exercise | 这很有趣,因为我手机上有张照片 我的治疗师告诉我做这个运动 |
| 410 | like eight months ago, which was a strategy for me to reclaim the love for myself, so | 像八个月前, 这是一个策略 我恢复爱自己,所以 |
| 411 | I have a photo of my childhood self. | 我有一张照片 我童年的自我。 |
| 412 | I don't know if people can see this on YouTube, but a photo of me, this is probably when I | 我不知道人们是否能在YouTube上看到这个, 但是一张我的照片,这可能是当我 |
| 413 | was like five or six, maybe I was seven, but something that I've tried to do and really | 大概是五六岁,也许我是七岁, 但我尝试过做一些事情,真的 |
| 414 | been integrating in my life is to reconnect with the child where I felt like I stopped | 我生命中的融合 就是和那个孩子重归于好 |
| 415 | loving myself. | 爱自己。 |
| 416 | Okay, so let's talk about this right now. | 好吧,让我们谈谈这个现在。 |
| 417 | You ready? | 你准备好了吗? |
| 418 | So let me talk about this image. | 让我来谈谈这个形象。 |
| 419 | So let's talk about the Lewis this age standing in front of a mirror. | 让我们来谈谈刘易斯这个年龄站在镜子前。 |
| 420 | Yeah, and what I do is I stand in front of myself as a child. | 是啊,我做什么是 我站在自己面前 作为一个孩子。 |
| 421 | I imagine myself, but to do it, imagine looking at the mirror as yourself. | 我想象自己,但为了做到这一点, 想象自己看着镜子。 |
| 422 | Yes. | 对 |
| 423 | Well, what I'm trying to say is when you were this age and you stood in front of the mirror, | 我想说的是 当你这个年龄 你站在镜子前 |
| 424 | you had a totally different relationship with yourself because you still loved yourself. | 你和你自己的关系完全不同 因为你仍然爱自己 |
| 425 | You still thought that you were a great kid and you wanted all the things that the adult | 你还以为你是个好孩子 想要成年人的一切 |
| 426 | Lewis wants. | 刘易斯想要 |
| 427 | You want to feel loved. | 你想感觉被爱。 |
| 428 | You want to feel seen. | 你想感觉被看见。 |
| 429 | You want to feel heard. | 你想感觉听到。 |
| 430 | You want to feel like you matter. | 你想感觉自己很重要 |
| 431 | And you, in seeing yourself when you were this age, felt those things for yourself. | 而你,在看到自己 当你这个年龄, |
| 432 | Yeah, absolutely. | 当然 |
| 433 | And somewhere along the way, you lost it. | 沿途某处,你失去了它。 |
| 434 | And so what I'm trying to say is that when you stand in front of this mirror, exactly | 所以我想说的是 当你站在这面镜子前 |
| 435 | what Lewis is talking about, when you've got coaches that scream at you and degrade you | 刘易斯在说什么,当你有教练 对你尖叫和贬低你 |
| 436 | and you know, sure, it makes you run faster, but it leaves its mark. | 你知道,当然,它让你跑得更快,但它留下了它的标记。 |
| 437 | It does. | 没错 |
| 438 | It leaves its mark. | 它留下了标记。 |
| 439 | And so there's research. | 所以还有研究 |
| 440 | So let me talk about why this is so motivating, particularly because so many of your audience | 让我来谈谈为什么这 如此激励,特别是因为这么多的观众 |
| 441 | love sports, right? | 喜欢运动 对吧? |
| 442 | So they did a study where they looked at NBA teams and what they wanted to take a look | 所以他们研究了NBA的球队 以及他们想看看什么 |
| 443 | at was does fist bumps, backpacks and high fives make a difference in a team winning | 拳击、背包和击掌 都对队内获胜有影响 |
| 444 | touch, right? | 摸摸,对不对? |
| 445 | Didn't they do like a 2020 special or something? | 他们不是喜欢2020年的特餐吗? |
| 446 | I don't know, but if they did, I need to watch it. | 我不知道,但如果他们这样做, 我需要看着它。 |
| 447 | But so like the power of touch, but I think it's deeper. | 但喜欢触摸的力量 但我觉得更深 |
| 448 | It's the power of encouragement. | 是以鼓励之力. |
| 449 | And so what they found is that in the study, at least in the years that they looked at, | 所以他们发现,在研究中,至少 在他们所观察的年代, |
| 450 | you could take a look at the teams that made it to the championships in the NBA, go all | 你可以看看在NBA的冠军赛上 进球的队伍 |
| 451 | the way back to the preseason. | 回到赛季前的路上 |
| 452 | And those were the teams that had the most number of fist bumps and backpacks and high | 这些队伍的拳头和背包数量最多,而且很高 |
| 453 | fives. | 5块 |
| 454 | Yep. | 对 |
| 455 | And the same was true about the teams that were the lowest in the league at the end of | 球队也一样 球队是联赛中最低的 |
| 456 | the season. | 这个季节。 |
| 457 | They had the least amount of fist bumps, high fives and touch. | 他们的拳头碰头次数最少,高五下和触摸. |
| 458 | Why? | 为什么? |
| 459 | They're the least encouraging. | 他们是最不令人鼓舞的。 |
| 460 | Correct. | 没错 |
| 461 | Those sorts of gestures build trust and partnership. | 这些姿态建立了信任和伙伴关系。 |
| 462 | I'm telling you, when you stand in front of a mirror and ignore yourself, you're like | 我告诉你,当你站在镜子前 无视自己,你就像 |
| 463 | the losing NBA team, selfish on your own, isolated. | 失去NBA的球队 自私自利 孤立无援 |
| 464 | You're not in partnership with the person you're staring at in the mirror. | 你和那个在镜子里看着的人没有伙伴关系 |
| 465 | You don't have your own back because you're ignoring yourself. | 你没有自己的背,因为你忽略自己。 |
| 466 | There's another study, and this one is, I think, even more powerful. | 还有另外一项研究, 我认为,这个研究更强大。 |
| 467 | So they did this study where they wanted to know what's the most motivating thing to help | 因此,他们做了这个研究 他们想知道什么是 最激励的东西帮助 |
| 468 | somebody get through a really big challenge. | 有人会遇到一个巨大的挑战 |
| 469 | The researchers divide kids into three groups, right? | 研究人员把孩子分成三个组,对吧? |
| 470 | And they gave each of the groups of kids very challenging problems to work through. | 他们给每个孩子组都带来了非常具有挑战性的问题。 |
| 471 | And they wanted to measure, okay, how resilient, how long would they work, what were their | 他们想要衡量,好吧, 有多有韧性, 他们要工作多久, 他们是什么 |
| 472 | attitudes like? | 那种态度? |
| 473 | And then they measured it based on, well, what form of praise or support are we going | 然后他们根据什么形式 的赞美或支持来衡量 |
| 474 | to give each one of these groups? | 给每个这些团体? |
| 475 | And let's see what's the most empowering. | 让我们看看什么是最有力量的。 |
| 476 | First group gets what we know to be the fixed mindset stuff. | 第一组得到我们知道的东西 是固定的心态的东西。 |
| 477 | The praise was all verbal praise, and it was simply about a trait. | 赞美都是口头赞美,它只是关于一个特征。 |
| 478 | Louis, you are so smart. | 路易,你真聪明 |
| 479 | Louis, you are a super student praising something that is just sort of a compliment about you. | 路易斯,你是一个超级学生 称赞的东西 只是一种恭维你。 |
| 480 | The second group of students working on a challenging problem got praise based on work | 第二组研究挑战性问题的学生在工作上获得了赞誉 |
| 481 | ethics, so something in their control. | 道德,所以有些东西在他们控制。 |
| 482 | Oh, Louis, you're working so hard. | 哦,路易,你这么努力。 |
| 483 | Louis, you got such good perseverance. | 路易斯,你坚持得真好 |
| 484 | Louis, you're really just grinding away over there. | 路易斯,你真的在那边磨蹭 |
| 485 | Good job. | 干得不错 |
| 486 | Those guys did better than Louis, you're smart. | 那些家伙比路易做得更好 你很聪明 |
| 487 | Louis, hardworking, better. | 路易斯,努力工作,更好。 |
| 488 | The third group, the researchers simply walked up, did not say a word and high-fived the | 第三组,研究者只是走了起来, 一个字也没说,击掌 |
| 489 | kid. | 孩子们。 |
| 490 | Really? | 真的吗? |
| 491 | That's it. | 就这样 |
| 492 | That group literally, exponentially, more motivated, worked longer, worked through more | 这个团体实际上,指数化, 更积极, 工作更长, 工作通过更多的 |
| 493 | challenging problems. | 挑战性的问题。 |
| 494 | Now, here's the big question, why? | 这是大问题,为什么? |
| 495 | Why would a simple high five with no verbal praise be more empowering and motivating and | 为什么一个简单的五重奏,没有口头称赞,更能增强能力,更能激励人们 |
| 496 | inspiring and develop more resilience and confidence and motivation inside somebody? | 激发和培养更多的复原能力、信心和积极性? |
| 497 | And the reason why is this, a high five affirms your deepest fundamental needs. | 这就是为什么,一个高五级肯定你最深的基本需求。 |
| 498 | It's not just a gesture. | 这不仅仅是一个姿态。 |
| 499 | When you high five somebody, particularly somebody who has either blown the free throw | 当你击掌5个人, 特别是有人 谁吹了自由投 |
| 500 | shot or is working on something difficult or going through a really hard time, when | 或正在做一些困难的事 或经历一个真正的困难时期,何时 |
| 501 | you high five them, you're saying, I see you. | 你打了五个,你说,我看见你了。 |
| 502 | When you high five them during a challenge, you actually are acknowledging, I know this | 当你在挑战中击打五架的时候, 你承认,我知道这一点 |
| 503 | is hard. | 很难 |
| 504 | So the person feels heard. | 所以,人感觉听到。 |
| 505 | And because it's one-to-one, and you have to be really intentional, like if you and | 因为它的一对一, 你必须是真正的故意, 就像如果你和 |
| 506 | I go to high five, we have to focus on it. | 我要去击掌,我们必须专注于它。 |
| 507 | That was a good one. | 这是一个很好的。 |
| 508 | If you miss it, what do you do? | 如果你错过了,你会怎么做? |
| 509 | You have to do it again. | 须再作么. |
| 510 | Correct. | 没错 |
| 511 | So there's an intentionality behind it, and that makes you feel like you're being affirmed | 因此,它背后有一个意图, 让你感觉自己被确认 |
| 512 | as a unique individual. | 作为一个独特的个体。 |
| 513 | Interesting. | 有意思,这很有趣 |
| 514 | And so all of those things are in that one gesture. | 所以,所有这些事情都是在一个姿态。 |
| 515 | Now it goes even more. | 现在它走的更远。 |
| 516 | So there's even more here. | 所以这里还有更多 |
| 517 | So I was talking to our buddy, Dr. Daniel Lehman, right? | 我和我们的朋友Daniel Lehman医生谈过了 对吧? |
| 518 | And so one of the world's leading experts on brains, he's got like 60,000 brain scans. | 所以,世界上脑部研究的顶尖专家之一, 他的大脑扫描有6万个。 |
| 519 | I think it's like 120,000. | 我认为这就像12万。 |
| 520 | Oh, is it at this point? | 哦,是现在吗? |
| 521 | It's crazy, yeah. | 这太疯狂了 |
| 522 | So he was so excited about the high five habit, he completely geeked out. | 所以他非常兴奋 对于高五的习惯, 他完全怪异了。 |
| 523 | He's like, oh my gosh. | 他就像,哦,我的天呐。 |
| 524 | Yes, yes, yes. | 对,对,对。 |
| 525 | He's like, yes, aerobics. | 他就像,是的,有氧运动。 |
| 526 | Yes, yes, yes. | 对,对,对。 |
| 527 | So we then, he said, let me tell you what else is going on, Mel. | 然后,他说,让我告诉你 还有什么事情发生,梅尔。 |
| 528 | And I'm like, really? | 而我喜欢,真的吗? |
| 529 | There's more? | 还有吗? |
| 530 | He said, yeah. | 他说,是的。 |
| 531 | He said, you know how when you do it, you said you felt like a little kind of boost | 他说,你知道 当你这样做, 你说你感觉 有点刺激 |
| 532 | in your mood? | 心情怎么样? |
| 533 | He said, well, there are two things going on there. | 他说,那里有两件事 |
| 534 | He said, first of all, when you cross a finish line in a race, what do you do? | 他说,首先,当你在比赛中越过终点线时,你会怎么做? |
| 535 | Put your hands up. | 举手曰. |
| 536 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 537 | What do you do in your favorite team sports? | 你最喜欢的球队运动是做什么的? |
| 538 | You high five someone. | 你杀了五个人 |
| 539 | Yeah, you high five somebody. | 是啊,你击掌5个人。 |
| 540 | What do you do at a musical concert? | 你在音乐会上做什么? |
| 541 | Yay. | 赞 |
| 542 | What do you do? | 你们是做什么的? |
| 543 | You're raising your hand in celebration when you high five somebody or fist bump them or | 你举起手来庆祝 当你击打五个人或者拳头打他们 |
| 544 | put your arm around them. | 把你的手臂围住他们。 |
| 545 | That raised arm gesture in a positive sense triggers your nervous system to tangle with | 举起手臂的姿势 以正向意义 触发你的神经系统 |
| 546 | celebration. | 庆祝 |
| 547 | It's the energy of celebration, even if you're going through something difficult. | 这是庆祝的能量, 即使你正在经历一些困难。 |
| 548 | And even more, you get a dopamine drip when you do this. | 更甚的是,你做这个的时候会得到多巴胺滴。 |
| 549 | And so part of the reason why you feel this kind of shift in your mood and you feel a | 这也是你感受这种转变的原因之一 |
| 550 | little bit of like, oh, okay, I can do it. | 有点像,哦,好吧,我可以做到这一点。 |
| 551 | I can face this. | 我可以面对这个。 |
| 552 | I can do this. | 我可以做到这一点。 |
| 553 | I got this. | 我来 |
| 554 | It's because of the dopamine, it's because of the nervous system, and it's because of | 由於多巴胺,由于神经系统,也由于 |
| 555 | all of this positive programming associated with that gesture. | 所有与这一姿态相关的这些积极的方案拟订。 |
| 556 | Isn't that crazy? | 是不是疯了? |
| 557 | That's powerful. | 这是强大的。 |
| 558 | I mean, so what does someone do, though, if they just constantly have the negative self | 我的意思是,所以什么人做,虽然, 如果他们只是不断有负面的自我 |
| 559 | talk in their mind that they're no good? | 在他们心底里说他们没用? |
| 560 | Do they go in front of the mirror every 10 minutes and do this, or is there another strategy | 他们每10分钟到镜子前做一次 还是有别的策略 |
| 561 | behind the negative self talk? | 在消极的自我对话背后? |
| 562 | Well, okay. | 嗯,没关系。 |
| 563 | So first things first, definitely make this high five in the mirror a habit, okay? | 所以首先 绝对要让镜子里这个五分球成为习惯 好吗 |
| 564 | So start practicing it, give it five to 10 days and start to see what happens. | 所以开始练习,给它5到10天 并开始看看会发生什么。 |
| 565 | The second thing that you can do with negative self talk, okay, is you need to start to interrupt | 第二,你可以做 负面的自我谈话,好吗, 你需要开始中断 |
| 566 | it. | 这个 |
| 567 | So the thing about negative self talk is that it is typically something you've engaged in | 所以消极的自我对话是 典型的你从事 |
| 568 | since you were yay high. | 自从你嗑药了 |
| 569 | And in addition to it being wired into your brain, it is also something that can get triggered | 它除了被连接到大脑之外, 也是可以被触发的东西 |
| 570 | by your nervous system in stressful situations. | 由你紧张的神经系统。 |
| 571 | And so the first step, and we can talk more about the filter in your brain and how the | 因此,第一步,我们可以谈论更多 关于过滤器 在你的大脑,如何 |
| 572 | filter in your brain is causing you to stay stuck in a lot of this negative self talk | 在你的大脑中过滤器 让你被困在很多负面的自我谈话中 |
| 573 | and how to use your mind to help you. | 以及如何利用你的头脑来帮助你。 |
| 574 | But the first step is you got to do the awful part of getting self aware of what | 但是第一步,你必须做 可怕的部分,让自己知道什么 |
| 575 | the voice is saying. | 声音在说 |
| 576 | And the way that you do that, there's a couple techniques that you can use to create what | 你这样做的方式,有几种技术 你可以用来创造什么 |
| 577 | researchers or psychologists call objectivity. | 研究者或心理学家称客观性。 |
| 578 | You want to separate yourself from the voice. | 欲自离声. |
| 579 | So you can do what Lewis is doing, he's writing down right now in a journal. | 所以你可以做刘易斯正在做的事, 他现在写在一本日记上。 |
| 580 | You can keep just a little notebook with you and you can kind of catalog when your attitude | 你可以只保留一个小笔记本 和你可以一种目录 当你的态度 |
| 581 | takes and what are you actually saying to yourself, okay? | 拿走,你到底在说什么,好吗? |
| 582 | So should we write down all the things we're saying negative about ourselves? | 所以我们应该记下我们对自己说消极的话吗? |
| 583 | You can. | 你当然可以 |
| 584 | I personally do it this way. | 我个人这样做。 |
| 585 | I start to notice when I feel down or I start to notice when my energy drops. | 我开始注意到 当我感到沮丧 或者我开始注意到 当我的能量下降。 |
| 586 | And then I tune into what I'm thinking about. | 然后随心所念. |
| 587 | And if it's negative, I go five, four, three, two, one. | 如果它是负的,我走五,四,三,二,一。 |
| 588 | I literally notice, oh, you're sitting there thinking you're a bad person again. | 我从字面上注意到,哦,你坐在那里 认为你又是一个坏人。 |
| 589 | Oh, you're sitting there thinking that somebody's mad at you again. | 哦,你坐在那里 以为有人又生你的气了。 |
| 590 | Oh, you're sitting there thinking that you screw everything up again. | 哦,你坐在那里 认为你搞砸了一切 再次。 |
| 591 | Oh, you're sitting there thinking that nothing ever works out for you. | 哦,你坐在那里 认为没有什么为你工作。 |
| 592 | Oh, you're sitting there thinking that you've blown it. | 哦,你坐在那里 以为你搞砸了。 |
| 593 | Interesting. | 有意思,这很有趣 |
| 594 | And then I go five, four, three, two, one, and I go, I'm not thinking about that. | 然后,我走五,四,三,二,一,我走,我不考虑这一点。 |
| 595 | That's the most basic technique to use because what I want you to do, since this is like | 这是最基本的技术,因为我想要你做什么, 因为这是像 |
| 596 | operating on autopilot, it's encoded right here when you're not really thinking this | 在自动驾驶上操作,它被编码在这里 当你不真正想这个 |
| 597 | is what's running, kind of like the soundtrack of your life. | 就像你人生的音轨 |
| 598 | When you just start to notice that you have a thought that's not helping you, you can't | 当你开始注意到 你有一个想法 对你没有帮助,你不能 |
| 599 | control that it popped up, but guess what you can do? | 控制它突然冒出来 但你猜你能做什么? |
| 600 | You can smack it down. | 你可以打它下来。 |
| 601 | And so I use the five-second rule, which we've talked about a lot on your show, count backwards | 所以我用五秒规则,我们已经谈论了很多 在你的节目,倒数 |
| 602 | five, four, three, two, one. | 五,四,三,两,一。 |
| 603 | The counting backwards awakens your prefrontal cortex. | 倒数唤醒你的前额皮层。 |
| 604 | It gives you a moment of control. | 让你有一点控制力 |
| 605 | And then the way to build distance, Louis, is say, I'm not thinking about that. | 路易,然后建立距离的方法 就是说,我不考虑这一点。 |
| 606 | And here's why. | 且道个甚么. |
| 607 | You're so used to thinking this way, I can't just say, stop thinking you're fat and start | 你这么习惯这样想,我不能说,别以为你胖了,开始 |
| 608 | thinking that you love your body. | 认为你爱你的身体。 |
| 609 | It's not going to happen. | 终不生灭. |
| 610 | So you've got to go, oh, there I am. | 所以,你必须去, 哦,我在这里。 |
| 611 | I'm trashing the way that I look. | 我在浪费我的样子 |
| 612 | I'm telling myself that I'm overweight. | 我对自己说我超重了 |
| 613 | I look like I'm hideous. | 我看起来像我丑陋。 |
| 614 | No one is going to love me. | 没有人会爱我。 |
| 615 | Be like, five, four, three, two, one. | 像,五,四,三,二,一。 |
| 616 | I am not thinking about that. | 我没有想这个。 |
| 617 | It's an act of defiance. | 这是违抗行为 |
| 618 | See, I want you to go from these negative thought patterns to a more positive, empowering | 你看,我希望你从这些负面的思维模式 走向一个更积极,更赋权 |
| 619 | {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}因为如果你继续生活 {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}我胖了 {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}我不值得 | |
| 620 | going to love me, I've screwed up my life, that will be your life. | 我会爱我,我已经搞砸了我的生活, 这将是你的生活。 |
| 621 | Right. | 对 |
| 622 | And the trick on this is, I'm not saying change your thoughts and unicorns appear. | 我并不是说改变你的想法 和独角兽出现 |
| 623 | I'm saying change your thoughts so you stop the 24-7 beat down and learn how to lift yourself | 我意思是改变你的想法 让你停止24 -7击倒 学会如何举起自己 |
| 624 | up so that you can face the things that are going on in your life and so that you can | 以便你能够面对你生活中发生的一切 |
| 625 | take the actions that you need to take to change your life. | 采取你需要的行动 改变你的生活。 |
| 626 | Because the reason why you're not changing is not because you're not capable. | 因为你没有改变的原因 不是因为你没有能力 |
| 627 | It's not because of the trauma or your past or anything else. | 这不是因为创伤 或你的过去或其他什么。 |
| 628 | It's because of the beat down. | 因击下. |
| 629 | That's why you're not changing. | 故不换. |
| 630 | It's draining. | 其气渐竭. |
| 631 | It's demoralizing. | 其气衰败. |
| 632 | And by the way, if you constantly are like, I'm unlovable, I'm worthy, I'm this, I'm | 顺便说一句,如果你总是喜欢, 我是不可爱的, 我值得,我这个,我 |
| 633 | that, why on earth would you feel motivated or do you think you deserve to change if that's | 为何你会觉得有动机 或者你认为你应该改变 |
| 634 | the thing in your mind? | 你脑子里的东西? |
| 635 | It doesn't work. | 亦无功用. |
| 636 | And so pay attention. | 所以请大家注意 |
| 637 | When you feel your energy go negative, you're like, oh, okay, whoa, that's disgusting. | 当你觉得你的能量是负的, 你喜欢,哦,好吧,哇,那是恶心的。 |
| 638 | I'm not thinking about that. | 我没在想这个 |
| 639 | You don't have to insert anything else. | 你不必插入其他东西。 |
| 640 | Let's just practice shutting it the hell up. | 让我们练习关闭它地狱。 |
| 641 | The second thing you can do is once you kind of get good at interrupting it, I want you | 你要做的第二件事是,一旦你有点 擅长打断它,我要你 |
| 642 | to name, like let's turn it into a character. | 名字,就像让我们把它变成一个角色。 |
| 643 | So I did this with our son Oakley when he was struggling pretty profoundly with anxiety | 我和我们的儿子Oakley做了这件事 当他和焦虑在一起时 |
| 644 | when he was in the fifth grade. | 他五年级的时候 |
| 645 | He named his anxiety Oliver. | 他给自己的焦虑取名奥利弗. |
| 646 | And then we asked him to describe Oliver. | 然后我们让他描述奥利弗 |
| 647 | And Oliver was like this pimply faced kid that, what is that? | 而奥利弗就像这个 皮条客面对的孩子 那是什么? |
| 648 | The Diary of the Wimpy Kid kind of bully looking kid. | 弱小小子的日记 那种欺负的小孩。 |
| 649 | And whenever the negative worries and stuff would come up, he would literally, you could | 每当负面的担忧和东西出现, 他字面上,你可以 |
| 650 | literally hear him go, Oliver, shut up. | 听到他走,奥利弗,闭嘴 |
| 651 | And it is the ability, what's happening when you name it and picture the person is that | 这是能力, 当你命名和想象的人是 |
| 652 | you're able to detach yourself from that voice in your mind that's talking. | 你可以从你脑海中的声音中分离出来 |
| 653 | Because that voice is typically a caregiver that either talked to you that way or talk | 因为那种声音一般是照顾你的人 要么那样跟你说话,要么说话 |
| 654 | to themselves that way or some bully or some trauma experience or some nasty coach that | 或一些欺负 或一些创伤经历 或一些肮脏的教练 |
| 655 | beat this into your head. | 把这个打进你的脑袋里 |
| 656 | It's from somebody else. | 是别人送的 |
| 657 | And so we want you to separate yourself so you can be like, oh, that's what Oliver sounds | 所以,我们希望你分开自己 这样你就可以,哦,这就是奥利弗听起来 |
| 658 | like. | 喜欢。 |
| 659 | That's not actually how I want to talk to myself. | 其实我不想这样跟自己说话 |
| 660 | And so identifying it, interrupting it, and then you can get into the really incredible | 从而识别它,打断它, 然后你可以进入 真正令人难以置信的 |
| 661 | magic of rewiring your brain to work for you. | 让你的大脑重新焊接来为你工作 |
| 662 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 663 | I think Ethan Cross, who's a psychologist out of the University of Michigan, has a book | 我想伊森·克罗斯是密歇根大学的心理学家 他有一本书 |
| 664 | called Chatter, which is about all the different psychological strategies for eliminating the | 叫做"查特尔",它涉及所有不同的心理策略 来消除 |
| 665 | negative self-talk and improving the quality of your mind. | 消极的自言自语,提高你的思想品质. |
| 666 | And he says, start coaching yourself just like you would have a great coach coaching | 他说,开始指导你自己 就像你会有一个伟大的教练指导 |
| 667 | you. | 你们 |
| 668 | Have someone like a character in your mind coaching you and celebrating you with your | 有个人像一个角色 在你的脑海里指导你 并庆祝你与你的 |
| 669 | self-talk to help you kind of shift out of that by interrupt it. | 自言自语 帮助你摆脱困境 通过打断它。 |
| 670 | Then coach yourself. | 那就当教练吧 |
| 671 | What would Lewis say to me? | 刘易斯会对我说什么? |
| 672 | What would Mel say to me? | 梅尔会对我说什么? |
| 673 | And here's the tricky part of this. | 这是最棘手的部分。 |
| 674 | So the tricky part of this is that I personally think most mantras are also complete garbage. | 我个人认为 大部分的漫画都是垃圾 |
| 675 | And the reason why I say that is because you don't freaking believe them. | 我之所以这么说 是因为你不相信他们 |
| 676 | Right. | 对 |
| 677 | So if you think you're worthless, you're never going to be able to stand in front of a mirror | 所以,如果你认为你没有价值, 你永远无法站在镜子前 |
| 678 | and change your life by going, I'm worthy, because your brain's like, no, you're not. | 改变你的生活,我值得 因为你的大脑就像,不,你不是。 |
| 679 | We've been talking about this for your life. | 你一辈子都在谈论这个 |
| 680 | You're not worthy. | 你配不来 |
| 681 | You know what I'm going to show you? | 你知道我要给你看什么吗? |
| 682 | So you have to interrupt it. | 所以你必须打断它。 |
| 683 | And if you're going to try to replace it, what you need to do are two things. | 如果你要尝试替换它, 你需要做的是两件事。 |
| 684 | Number one, you have got to come up with, I should have called it pathetic mantra because | 第一,你必须想出办法, 我该称之为可悲的口号,因为 |
| 685 | it would have been easier to remember. | 那会更容易记住 |
| 686 | In the book, I called it a meaningful mantra. | 在书中,我称它为有意义的口语. |
| 687 | We should just call it a pathetic mantra. | 我们应该称之为可悲的口号 |
| 688 | You need to come up with something that's like, okay, if you're really bad and you think | 你需要想出一些事情,像,好吧, 如果你真的坏,你认为 |
| 689 | you're a horrible person, don't make your mantra, I'm amazing. | 你是一个可怕的人, 不要做你的漫画, 我惊人。 |
| 690 | Make your mantra like, I'm doing the best I can. | 让你的漫画像, 我尽力了。 |
| 691 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 692 | That's it. | 就这样 |
| 693 | Something simple. | 很简单的 |
| 694 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 695 | You can believe that. | 你可以相信这一点。 |
| 696 | Right? | 对吧? |
| 697 | You can believe that. | 你可以相信这一点。 |
| 698 | I'm trying. | 我在试 |
| 699 | I'm not meaning to screw up. | 我不是故意要搞砸的。 |
| 700 | I'm doing the best I can. | 我尽力了 |
| 701 | That, I believe. | 这,我相信。 |
| 702 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 703 | And that's better than, boy. | 这比孩子好 |
| 704 | I'm the best in the world right now. | 我现在是世上最棒的 |
| 705 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 706 | No. | 没有 |
| 707 | You're never going to believe that. | 你永远不会相信这一点。 |
| 708 | Ever. | 从来没有。 |
| 709 | Ever, ever. | 永远,永远。 |
| 710 | For example, if you struggle with health and weight and stuff, it's probably going to be | 比如说,如果你与健康、体重和东西纠缠在一起,那很可能是 |
| 711 | hard for you to stand in front of a mirror and be like, I love my body because you've | 很难让你站在镜子前 像,我爱我的身体 因为你已经 |
| 712 | been rejecting it. | 一直拒绝 |
| 713 | So instead, look at yourself in the mirror and use a meaningful mantra. | 所以,照照镜子,用一个有意义的口号。 |
| 714 | I deserve to feel healthy and I'm going to treat myself in a way that proves it. | 我有权感到健康 我会用证明自己的方式对待自己 |
| 715 | That's it. | 就这样 |
| 716 | That's different. | 这是不同的。 |
| 717 | It's different because it's believable. | 以是信解故不同. |
| 718 | The only other thing that will change the way that you think is behavioral activation | 唯一能改变你所认为的方式的是行为激活 |
| 719 | therapy. | 治疗。 |
| 720 | So there's a lot of the tools in this book that are grounded as a baseline in the body | 因此这本书中有很多工具 被作为身体的基线 |
| 721 | of research around behavioral activation therapy, which I know you talk about all the time on | 关于行为激活疗法的研究 我知道你一直在谈论 |
| 722 | the show, which is basically act like the person you want to become. | 表演,基本上 表现像你想成为的人。 |
| 723 | Right. | 对 |
| 724 | If you want to be more like Lewis, act like Lewis. | 如果你想更像刘易斯 表现得像刘易斯 |
| 725 | Follow his morning routine. | 顺着他早上的习惯 |
| 726 | Take his advice. | 接受他的建议 |
| 727 | Interrupt the garbage, Oliver, in your head. | 打断垃圾,奥利弗,在你头上。 |
| 728 | Five, four, three, I'm not talking to you, Oliver. | 五,四,三,我不是跟你说话,奥利弗 |
| 729 | What would Lewis say to me? | 刘易斯会对我说什么? |
| 730 | How would Lewis talk to Lewis? | 刘易斯会怎么跟刘易斯说话? |
| 731 | And start to act like the person you want to become and something interesting happens. | 开始像你想成为的人一样 发生一些有趣的事情 |
| 732 | And this is why the high five works, by the way, because it is an action. | 顺便说一句,这就是为什么五强之所以起作用, 因为它是一种行动。 |
| 733 | You are acting like somebody who believes in and loves themself. | 你表现得像个相信并爱他们的人 |
| 734 | That's why it works. | 故能通达. |
| 735 | Moving to motion, don't just think only, but move and act. | 动起来,不只是思考,而是行动 |
| 736 | So when you see yourself, you know, we always talk about positive morning routines. | 所以当你看到自己,你知道, 我们总是谈论积极的早晨常规。 |
| 737 | Let's talk about negative ones, okay? | 我们来谈谈负面的,好吗? |
| 738 | Because your negative patterns are the reason why you have horrible self-talk. | 因为你的负面模式 就是你自言自语的原因 |
| 739 | Like when I was in law school, I hated my life. | 就像我在法学院的时候 我恨我的生活 |
| 740 | My anxiety was out of control. | 我的焦虑已经失控了 |
| 741 | I was out of control. | 我当时失控了 |
| 742 | I hated law school. | 我讨厌法学院 |
| 743 | And so my behavior actually reflected my state of mind. | 所以我的行为反映了我的思想状态。 |
| 744 | I would wake up hungover. | 我会醒来 宿醉。 |
| 745 | I would immediately think, oh my God, I'm late. | 我马上会想 我迟到了 |
| 746 | I would then reach for a cigarette and light it. | 然后我会去买支烟,然后点燃它。 |
| 747 | Then I would run around the apartment getting dressed and trying to find everything because | 然后,我会跑 在公寓里穿衣服 并试图找到一切 因为 |
| 748 | nothing was organized. | 没有组织起来。 |
| 749 | I would then quickly drive to Dunkin' Donuts, even though I had no time to stop for coffee. | 我会很快开车去Dunkin'甜甜圈, 尽管我没有时间停下来喝咖啡。 |
| 750 | I'd get a big old coffee with four sugars and two creams. | 我会得到一个大老咖啡 用四糖和两个奶油。 |
| 751 | Smoking another cigarette on the way, speeding my whole way there. | 路上又抽了根烟 超速赶到那里 |
| 752 | Then I would sit in class, be panic-stricken about being called on. | 然后,我会坐在课堂上, 惊慌失措地被召唤。 |
| 753 | Same thing again. | 又一样 |
| 754 | Then I would sit at lunch, picket a salad, gossip with friends, avoid the homework. | 然后,我会坐在午餐, 纠察沙拉,八卦与朋友, 避免作业。 |
| 755 | Then I would go to the library, procrastinate forever. | 然后,我会去图书馆, 拖延永远。 |
| 756 | Then I would drive home, split a bottle of wine with my roommate, fall asleep, wake up, | 然后我开车回家 和室友分瓶酒 睡着了 醒来 |
| 757 | repeat. | 重复 。 |
| 758 | When you see somebody's actions, you can typically predict just how bad they're trapped in their | 当你看到某人的举动, 你通常可以预测 他们被困在他们 |
| 759 | mind. | 头脑。 |
| 760 | Absolutely. | 当然 |
| 761 | But I think we all are. | 但我认为我们都是 |
| 762 | I mean, I think even people that have healthy habits don't have a healthy relationship with | 我的意思是,我认为 即使有健康习惯的人 没有健康的关系 |
| 763 | themselves. | 他们自己。 |
| 764 | That your self-talk is ground zero because how you talk to yourself, what you think about | 你的自言自语是零 因为你如何对自己说话,你在想什么 |
| 765 | yourself when you look in the mirror, that sort of default setting in your mind, jeez, | 当你照镜子时 你脑海里的默认设定 |
| 766 | Louise. | 露易丝 |
| 767 | I mean, it makes me really sad, honestly. | 我的意思是,这让我真的很伤心,说实话。 |
| 768 | I gave my first speech in two years because of the pandemic yesterday in Salt Lake. | 由于昨天盐湖大流行,我做了两年来的第一次演讲。 |
| 769 | There was a book line. | 有一个书行。 |
| 770 | And even though everybody had masks and they were six feet away, you could see the pain | 即使每个人都有面具,他们离我们六英尺远, 你可以看到痛苦 |
| 771 | in people's eyes, the isolation, the sadness, the overwhelm, the feeling of uncertainty. | 在人们的眼中,孤立,悲伤,压倒,不确定的感觉. |
| 772 | And I think that people are feeling way more uncertain and afraid than they're actually | 我认为人们感觉 更加不确定和害怕 比他们实际上 |
| 773 | saying right now. | 说现在。 |
| 774 | That the sustained amount of change that we've been having to manage, it's too much. | 我们一直以来的改变 太多了 |
| 775 | It's a lot. | 甚处来. |
| 776 | And if you stand in front of the mirror and you can't see somebody that's worth supporting | 如果你站在镜子前 你看不到值得支持的人 |
| 777 | through this, you're just going to continue to go down because the one person that you | 通过这个,你只是要继续下去 因为一个人你 |
| 778 | spend your whole life with is you. | 与你共度一生 |
| 779 | And this is the relationship you need to be working on. | 这就是你需要处理的关系。 |
| 780 | You want to be loved? | 你想被爱? |
| 781 | You better learn how to love yourself. | 你最好学会爱自己 |
| 782 | You want to feel worthy? | 你想觉得值得吗? |
| 783 | Stop looking for it out there and treat yourself like you're worthy. | 别再在外面找了 把自己当成值得的 |
| 784 | How do you do that? | 你怎么做到的? |
| 785 | Well, by pushing through the resistance and raising your hand. | 嗯,通过推动 通过抵抗和举起你的手。 |
| 786 | Like, if you can't freaking high five your reflection, you can't do that. | 喜欢,如果你不能 freak 5你的反射, 你不能做到这一点。 |
| 787 | How the hell are you going to make things happen in your life if you don't think you | 如果你不认为你会怎样让事情发生 |
| 788 | are worthy of support and celebration, particularly when life is hard? | 值得支持和庆祝,特别是在生活艰难的时候? |
| 789 | Yeah, how are you going to believe that other people are going to do that for you as well? | 是啊,你怎么能相信 其他人会这样做 也为你? |
| 790 | If you can't do it for yourself, why would other people do that? | 如果你不能为自己做, 为什么别人会这样做? |
| 791 | Well, actually, this is why people's relationships don't work out. | 事实上,这就是人际关系不起作用的原因。 |
| 792 | Because you're looking outside yourself for the things you actually need. | 因为你在寻找你真正需要的东西 |
| 793 | For validation. | 用于审定. |
| 794 | Correct. | 没错 |
| 795 | You are chasing people and seeking validation in romantic relationships. | 你在追人 寻求浪漫关系中的认可 |
| 796 | And that will end when you can stand in front of that mirror and validate yourself. | 当你站在镜子前 验证一下自己时,就结束了。 |
| 797 | When you build yourself up, when you support yourself, you show up totally differently | 当你建立自己,当你支持自己, 你出现了完全不同的 |
| 798 | for everybody else. | 给其他人 |
| 799 | When you know that you can have your own back, you're not going to be looking for the validation | 当你知道你可以拥有自己的背, 你将不寻找验证 |
| 800 | from your boss or your friends or all these other things. | 从你的老板或你的朋友 或其他所有的东西。 |
| 801 | People have problems with boundaries because they can't look themselves in the eye. | 人们有边界问题,因为他们不能直视自己的眼睛. |
| 802 | So how the hell are they going to look somebody else in the eye and say, actually, this doesn't | 所以他们怎么看别人的眼睛 说,实际上,这不是 |
| 803 | work for me? | 为我工作? |
| 804 | Thank you for having me. | 谢谢你邀请我 |
| 805 | And you, I think of probably anybody on the planet will get what I'm about to say in your | 还有你 我想地球上的任何人 都会得到我要说的话 |
| 806 | Because you understand the profound impact that the five second rule is a starting ritual | 因为你明白 5 秒规则的深远影响 是开始仪式 |
| 807 | has has had on millions of people's lives, helping them move from thinking to doing. | 帮助人们从思维走向行动。 |
| 808 | And even sitting here, Jim, with you, which it's just an honor being such a fan of your | 甚至坐在这里,吉姆, 和你在一起,这只是一个荣誉 作为你的粉丝 |
| 809 | work to to be here with you, even sitting here knowing the impact that the five second | 工作在这里和你在一起, 即使坐在这里知道 影响五秒钟 |
| 810 | rule has had on millions of people's lives. | 统治使数百万人的生命受到影响。 |
| 811 | I'm going to tell you something. | 我要告诉你一件事 |
| 812 | That's the high five habit is an even bigger deal with more profound change. | 这就是高五的习惯,是更深刻变化的更大问题. |
| 813 | And I can't wait to unpack it. | 我迫不及待想拆开它 |
| 814 | But I'll tell you personally, I use the five second rule to turn my life around to go from | 但我会亲自告诉你 我用五秒规则 改变我的生活 |
| 815 | being bankrupt to being extraordinarily successful to changing every habit I have to improving | 破产 变得非常成功 改变我必须改变的习惯 |
| 816 | my marriage. | 我的婚姻。 我结婚。 |
| 817 | It got me into action. | 这让我开始行动。 |
| 818 | But I'll tell you what it never did. | 但我会告诉你它从来没有做过什么 |
| 819 | It never silenced the critic in my head that I lived with. | 我和那个评论家住在一起 从来没有让他沉默过 |
| 820 | It never ended the relentless beat down that I was giving myself. | 它从来没有结束 无情的击倒 我给自己。 |
| 821 | And it never broke the habit that I had of constantly hating myself or focusing on the | 它从来没有打破习惯,我一直恨自己 或者专注于 |
| 822 | things that weren't working instead of celebrating myself and focusing on the things that were. | 事情是无效的 而不是庆祝自己 并专注于那些事情。 |
| 823 | And the high five habit cuts right down through all that noise and reconnects you with the | 高五的习惯 穿过所有的噪音 让你与 |
| 824 | you that's in there with the confidence that is your birthright. | 里面有你天生的自信 |
| 825 | And the way that it literally reprogrammed your mind is breathtaking. | 重新编程你的思想的方式令人惊叹 |
| 826 | Well, you know, I we talk a lot about morning routines. | 嗯,你知道,我谈了很多 关于早晨的例行公事。 |
| 827 | And this was the easiest thing to add to my routine. | 这是最容易增加我的常规。 |
| 828 | That's given me so much in return. | 这给了我这么多回报。 |
| 829 | And not just in terms of in a short period of time, you know, in terms of the rebel, | 而且不只是在短时间内,你知道的, 对于反叛者, |
| 830 | but even just immediately, you know, just celebrating myself in the bathroom mirror. | 但即使是立即,你知道, 只是庆祝我自己在浴室镜子。 |
| 831 | And we could we could talk about how that works. | 我们可以谈谈它是如何运作的。 |
| 832 | I'm also, by the way, pulling back a big fan of just counting down from five, you know, | 顺便说一句,我从五个人中 抽回了一个大粉丝 |
| 833 | getting myself out of bed or getting myself to put on my running shoes. | 把我自己从床上弄下来 或者让我穿上我的跑鞋 |
| 834 | And so I could see I could see the difference in how they complement each other so well. | 这样我就能看出它们如何互补的区别。 |
| 835 | And so maybe we could walk our listeners through this. | 所以也许我们可以让我们的听众通过这个。 |
| 836 | And I would highly recommend everyone. | 我非常推荐每个人 |
| 837 | I mean, our audience loves to read to make sure you get your copy also as well. | 我的意思是,我们的观众喜欢阅读 以确保你得到你的副本了。 |
| 838 | Well, so it's very simple. | 很简单 |
| 839 | And since I know that your listeners want to get right into the science and right into what to do, | 既然我知道你的听众想直接进入科学界 进入科学界 |
| 840 | I'm not even going to tell you the story because I did not set out to create this. | 我甚至不打算告诉你这个故事 因为我没有开始创造这个。 |
| 841 | I created the high five habit on a morning that everybody can relate to | 我在早上创造了五高的习惯 每个人都可以联系到 |
| 842 | a morning where life felt overwhelming, a morning where I felt defeated, | 一天早晨 生活感到压倒性, 一天早晨 我感到失败, |
| 843 | a morning where I felt sort of stuck and dreading the day. | 一个早晨,我觉得有点卡住了 和害怕的一天。 |
| 844 | And I was standing there brushing my teeth, Jim, and I catch my reflection in the mirror. | 我站在那里刷牙 吉姆 我在镜子里看到反光 |
| 845 | And I think, oh, you look like hell. | 我认为,哦,你看起来像地狱。 |
| 846 | And then all of a sudden, I started to criticize the way that I looked like the dark circles | 突然间,我开始批评 我看起来像黑暗的圈子 |
| 847 | under my eyes, the bags under my like kind of chin and neck and one boobs hanging lower than the other. | 在我的眼皮底下,我下面的包 像一种下巴和颈部, 和一个胸 悬挂低于另一个。 |
| 848 | And then once your thoughts go negative, they kind of take you down. | 一旦你的思想变得消极, 他们就会把你打倒。 |
| 849 | So now I'm thinking about my day ahead and I'm beating myself up. | 所以,现在我想我的一天 提前,我打自己。 |
| 850 | Why did I get up so late? | 为什么我这么晚起床? |
| 851 | And I've only got eight minutes to the first call and the dog hasn't even been walked. | 我只有八分钟的第一通电话 狗甚至没有被步行。 |
| 852 | And you just said something interesting. | 你刚才说了一些有趣的话 |
| 853 | It's an easy thing. | 这是件容易的事。 |
| 854 | The high five habit is an easy thing to add to the morning routine. | 高五的习惯是容易增加早晨的习惯. |
| 855 | We all talk a lot about morning routines. | 我们都经常谈论早上的例行公事 |
| 856 | It wasn't until I discovered this that I realized there was a piece to my morning routine | 直到我发现这个,我才意识到 我早晨的例行公事有一段 |
| 857 | I was not even aware of a habit that I needed to break, Jim, | 我什至不知道一个习惯 我需要打破,吉姆, |
| 858 | a habit that gratitude and exercise and all this stuff was not actually erasing | 感恩和锻炼的习惯 和所有这些东西 其实不是去除 |
| 859 | a habit of standing before the bathroom mirror and either ignoring the human being you see in the mirror | 一个站在浴室镜子前的习惯 要么无视镜子里看到的人 |
| 860 | or criticizing them. | 或者批评他们。 |
| 861 | That is how we start our day. | 这就是我们如何开始我们的一天。 |
| 862 | 91% of women don't like how they look. | 91%的女性不喜欢她们的样子. |
| 863 | 50% of us can't even look in the mirror. | 我们50%的人甚至不能照镜子 |
| 864 | I know it's true for men too. | 我知道这对男人也是 |
| 865 | We stand in judgment. | 我们接受审判。 |
| 866 | And so what happened for me this morning, here's the high five habit. | 今天早上发生在我身上的事, 这是五强的习惯。 |
| 867 | It is profoundly simple. | 这非常简单。 |
| 868 | It's going to change your life the second you're done brushing your teeth. | 一旦刷完牙 生活就会改变 |
| 869 | And I want you to do it right after you brush your teeth because I want you to stack this habit | 我要你在刷牙后马上做 因为我要你把这个习惯堆起来 |
| 870 | with something you're already doing because you know, because you listen to this podcast | 和一些你已经在做的事情 因为你知道, 因为你听这个播客 |
| 871 | that it's the fastest way to learn a new behavior. | 这是学习新行为最快的方法 |
| 872 | Let's get the gunk out of your teeth so you don't spread dragon breath on everybody. | 把牙拔出来 别把龙气吹到每个人身上 |
| 873 | Now let's get the gunk out of your head so you're not spreading negativity throughout your day. | 现在,让我们从你的头上拿枪, 这样你不会扩散 消极的一天。 |
| 874 | As you stand in front of the mirror, I want you to leverage a little piece of research from Harvard. | 在你站在镜子前的时候 我要你利用哈佛的一点研究 |
| 875 | New research shows that if you take less than a minute and you intentionally think about the day | 新的研究表明,如果你花不到一分钟 并且你故意想一天 |
| 876 | ahead and how you're going to show up as a leader, it changes your productivity, your focus, | 以及你如何以领袖身份出现, 它改变了你的生产力,你的焦点, |
| 877 | how you show up and your ability to impact people. | 如何出现 和你的能力 影响人。 |
| 878 | Let's throw that out the window in terms of being a leader. | 我们把这抛出窗外 说成领导者 |
| 879 | And let's look in the mirror and let's use that for ourselves to improve our own lives. | 让我们照照镜子 用它来改善我们的生活 |
| 880 | I want you to take a second and I want you to realize | 我要你再等一会,然后你意识到 |
| 881 | there's actually two people in the bathroom every morning, Jim. | 每天早上有两个人在洗手间,吉姆 |
| 882 | There's you and there's a human being in the mirror that's been waiting for you | 有你和镜子里的人一直在等你 |
| 883 | to wake up and realize they need you. | 醒来意识到他们需要你 |
| 884 | They're trying hard. | 他们很努力 |
| 885 | They've got a good heart. | 他们有一颗好心。 |
| 886 | They need your support and your encouragement. | 他们需要你的支持和鼓励 |
| 887 | They need you to see them. | 他们需要你看看他们。 |
| 888 | They need you to love them. | 他们需要你爱他们。 |
| 889 | That is literally what I'm talking about when I talk about the high five habit that you wake up | 当我说起你醒过来的五重身时,这就是我说的 |
| 890 | and recognize there is a person you go through life with that stares you back in the mirror | 并承认有一个人 你经历的生活 与你凝视在镜子 |
| 891 | every morning and your habit right now is to tear them down or ignore them. | 每天早上,你的习惯是 拆掉或忽略它们。 |
| 892 | And I want you to set an intention and I want you to look at them in the morning. | 我要你设定一个意图 我要你早上看看 |
| 893 | And this is going to feel weird because you're going to realize I've never actually | 这会觉得奇怪 因为你会意识到我从来没有 |
| 894 | asked myself this question. | 我问自己这个问题。 |
| 895 | And here's the question. | 问曰. |
| 896 | What is that person in the mirror? | 镜子里那个人是什么? |
| 897 | What is she or he or they? | 她还是他? |
| 898 | What do they need from me today? | 他们今天需要我做什么? |
| 899 | We think about it for work, for our families, for everybody else. | 我们考虑它是为了工作,为了我们的家人,为了其他人。 |
| 900 | You've never stopped and asked yourself looking at yourself in the mirror. | 你从未停下来 问自己在镜子里看着自己 |
| 901 | How do I need to show up for that person today? | 我今天要怎么为那个人出场? |
| 902 | Then, as you've got that intention, despite the fact that it feels weird, | 那么,既然你有这个意图, 尽管它感觉很奇怪, |
| 903 | despite the fact that you're going to resist this, | 尽管你要抗拒这个事实 |
| 904 | we can talk about why you're going to feel most likely resistance. | 我们可以谈谈为什么你会感到最有可能的抵抗。 |
| 905 | I then want you to raise your hand and I want you to high five the reflection. | 然后,我要你举起手来,我要你击打五个反射。 |
| 906 | And what's amazing about this new habit, Jim, | 这新习惯有什么了不起的 吉姆 |
| 907 | is your brain and your nervous system are already designed to do the work for you. | 你的大脑和神经系统 已经设计好了为你工作 |
| 908 | Because also, you think about how we high five other people throughout the day | 因为,你还想着 我们如何打其他五个人一整天 |
| 909 | and to celebrate them, to encourage them, but we're not always doing that. | 和庆祝他们,鼓励他们, 但我们并不总是这样做。 |
| 910 | It's interesting because no amount of love is enough to fill the yearning | 这很有趣,因为没有多少爱 足以满足渴望 |
| 911 | that our soul requires from ourselves. | 我们的灵魂需要我们自己 |
| 912 | When do we work daily on being in love with that person in the mirror | 什么时候我们每天工作 爱上镜子里的那个人 |
| 913 | who's been through so much but is still standing? | 谁经历了这么多,但仍站着? |
| 914 | Yeah, and think about some of the habits that we know based on research. | 对,想想我们根据研究了解的一些习惯。 |
| 915 | Change your life. | 改变你的生活。 |
| 916 | Meditation. | 深思议. |
| 917 | Meditation is profoundly important. | 冥想至关重要。 |
| 918 | The benefits you talk about all the time. | 你一直在谈论的好处。 |
| 919 | Meditation develops self-awareness. | 冥想发展自我意识. |
| 920 | It also helps you learn how to be non-reactive to your thoughts, | 这也帮助你学会如何对自己的思想不作出反应 |
| 921 | but it doesn't change your default thoughts. | 但这并不改变你的默认想法。 |
| 922 | Gratitude, also hugely important, tremendous benefit. | 感谢, 也非常重要, 巨大的好处。 |
| 923 | Yes, you should have a gratitude practice. | 是的,你应该有一个感谢练习。 |
| 924 | However, almost all of us, when we practice gratitude, | 然而,几乎所有的我们, 当我们练习感谢, |
| 925 | we think about things outside of ourselves that we're grateful for. | 我们想着我们心存感激的事 |
| 926 | The high five habit is about bringing the power back in-house. | 高五的习惯是将电力带回内部. |
| 927 | It's about giving you a science-backed tool that will teach you through a simple action | 是要给你一个科学工具 通过简单的行动来教你 |
| 928 | how to support, how to love, how to encourage, how to celebrate yourself every single day. | 如何支持,如何爱,如何鼓励,如何每天庆祝自己. |
| 929 | Let me explain the science because this is where things get crazy. | 让我来解释一下科学 因为这里是事情变得疯狂的地方。 |
| 930 | The reason why this works is because of the programming that's already in your brain. | 之所以能成功 是因为你的大脑里已经有编程了 |
| 931 | You have a lifetime of giving and receiving high fives. | 你有一生的付出和接受 击掌。 |
| 932 | In fact, Jim, when somebody high fives you or you high five somebody else, | 事实上,吉姆,当有人击掌你或你击掌五,别人, |
| 933 | what does the gesture alone of a high five tell somebody else? | 单凭一个击掌的手势 会告诉别人什么? |
| 934 | That they are extraordinary, they are amazing, congratulations, you're winning. | 他们是非凡的, 他们是惊人的,恭喜, 你赢了。 |
| 935 | Exactly, exactly. | 没错,没错。 |
| 936 | You don't ever high five somebody and say, I hate you. | 你从来不打5个人 说,我恨你。 |
| 937 | You always high five and are like, I love you, we got this, no problem. | 你总是击掌 喜欢,我爱你, 我们得到了这个,没有问题。 |
| 938 | Go get them, you're going to win, even if somebody just blew it. | 去找他们,你会赢的 即使有人搞砸了 |
| 939 | You high five them and it's like, shake it off, come on. | 你击打5个 然后它就像,摇下来,来吧。 |
| 940 | I still believe in you, let's go. | 我仍然相信你,我们走吧 |
| 941 | All of that programming is right here in the interior of your brain. | 所有的程序都在你的大脑内部 |
| 942 | It's in your basal ganglia. | 在你的玄武关里 |
| 943 | It is in your subconscious. | 这是在你的潜意识。 |
| 944 | It is sitting there and it is married to the action of high fiving. | 它坐在那里,它与高飞的行为成婚。 |
| 945 | What happens is when you stand there, you set this intention, you're with yourself, | 当你站在那里, 你设定了这个意图, 你和自己在一起, |
| 946 | you see yourself, you feel the resistance, you ignore the resistance, | 你看见自己,感觉到抵抗,你忽略抵抗, |
| 947 | you go to high five yourself. | 你自己去击掌。 |
| 948 | Your brain's like, oh, I know what this gesture means. | 你的大脑就像, 哦,我知道这个姿态意味着什么。 |
| 949 | It activates the subconscious programming. | 它激活了潜意识编程. |
| 950 | It silences the critic and the beat down. | 它让评论家和被打倒的人安静下来. |
| 951 | You can't think anything but positive thoughts. | 你除了积极的想法 什么都想不出来 |
| 952 | It's impossible neurologically because of the programming already in your brain. | 这在神经上是不可能的,因为你的大脑已经编程了。 |
| 953 | And then over time, if you do this, give me just five days. | 然后随着时间的推移,如果你这样做, 给我仅仅五天。 |
| 954 | You do this five days in a row. | 你连续五天做这个 |
| 955 | Fight through the weirdness because it's new and the resistance | 战斗通过怪异,因为它是新的和抵抗 |
| 956 | because you have the opposite habit. | 因为你有相反的习惯 |
| 957 | You judge yourself, you reject yourself. | 你评判自己,你拒绝自己。 |
| 958 | When you high five yourself, it silences that. | 当你自己击掌时,它会沉默。 |
| 959 | It activates the programming that's already in your brain | 它激活了已经在你大脑里的编程 |
| 960 | and it starts to marry it with your own reflection. | 它开始用你的反射来结婚 |
| 961 | And that's not all. | 且道不尽. |
| 962 | I talked to our buddy, Dr. Amen, the other day. | 前几天我和我们的朋友阿门医生谈过了 |
| 963 | He went bananas when he heard about this. | 他听说这件事就去吃香蕉了 |
| 964 | He's like, Mel, holy cow. | 他就像,梅尔,神圣的牛。 |
| 965 | Do you realize you also get a boost in your mood | 你知不知道你的心情也会好起来? |
| 966 | because when you high five other people, you get a dopamine drip. | 因为当你给另外五个人注射了多巴胺之后 你就会得到多巴胺滴水 |
| 967 | So you get a dopamine drip when you do this to yourself. | 所以,你得到多巴胺滴 当你这样做自己。 |
| 968 | He also said, you know how when you come into the bathroom | 他还说,你知道 当你来到浴室时如何 |
| 969 | and you're kind of dragging in the energy and when you high five yourself, | 当你自己击掌时 |
| 970 | whether it's because you laugh or because you just kind of feel good, | 无论是因为你笑 还是因为你感觉很好 |
| 971 | you get this little like pep in your step. | 你脚下有这么小的血迹 |
| 972 | So you start your day feeling slightly more energized. | 所以,你开始你的一天 感觉稍有活力。 |
| 973 | I'm like, yeah, Dr. Amen, tell me about that. | 是的 阿门医生 告诉我 |
| 974 | He said, well, that's your nervous system. | 他说那是你的神经系统 |
| 975 | Your nervous system is encoded with celebratory energy. | 你的神经系统是用庆祝能量编码的 |
| 976 | When you cross the finish line, you raise your hands. | 过终点时举手. |
| 977 | When your favorite team scores, you raise your hands. | 你最喜欢的球队得分时,举起手来. |
| 978 | When you say hello to somebody, you raise your hands. | 当你和别人打招呼时,举起手来 |
| 979 | When you hug somebody, you raise your hands. | 当你拥抱某人,你举起手来。 |
| 980 | When you high five, you raise your hands. | 击掌时举手. |
| 981 | Your nervous system remembers it. | 你的神经系统记得 |
| 982 | That's where the energy comes from. | 这就是能量的来源。 |
| 983 | The coolest thing about the high five habit, Jim, is the programming is already in you | 高五的习惯最酷的是 编程已经在你身上了 |
| 984 | because you've been doing this your whole life for everybody else. | 因为你一辈子都在为别人做这个 |
| 985 | And we are hardwired for this. | 我们对此很负责 |
| 986 | Hardwired. | 铁丝网. |
| 987 | In fact, when you were born, DNA in your DNA was celebration and joy. | 事实上,当你出生的时候,DNA中的DNA就是庆祝和快乐. |
| 988 | Little kids, when you see them in front of a mirror, | 小孩子们,当你看到他们在镜子前, |
| 989 | they don't step back and go, my thighs are fat. | 他们不退后走 我的大腿很胖 |
| 990 | Man, I'm a loser. | 伙计 我是个失败者 |
| 991 | They don't do that. | 他们不这样做。 |
| 992 | They spin. | 他们旋转。 |
| 993 | They high five the mirror. | 他们把镜子打中了五个 |
| 994 | They kiss the mirror. | 他们亲吻镜子。 |
| 995 | They love themselves. | 他们爱自己。 |
| 996 | This is your birthright. | 这是你天生的权利。 |
| 997 | It was your life experience that taught you to judge and reject yourself. | 正是你的人生经历教会你 判断和拒绝自己。 |
| 998 | And I'm here to tell you this simple habit of standing before the mirror | 我是来告诉你 站在镜子前的简单习惯 |
| 999 | and raising your hand and high fiving yourself, | 举起手来,高举头来, |
| 1000 | like you so willingly do for everybody else. | 就像你这么愿意为其他人做一样 |
| 1001 | You don't have to say a thing. | 你什么都不用说 |
| 1002 | You can have resistance. | 你可以有反抗。 |
| 1003 | You can feel that it's weird. | 你能感觉到这很奇怪。 |
| 1004 | You can literally reject it in your mind as you start to do it. | 在你开始做的时候 你可以在你的脑海里拒绝它 |
| 1005 | And you will experience massive transformation as you complete the gesture | 你会经历巨大的转变 当你完成手势 |
| 1006 | because your mind is wired for this. | 因为你的脑子里有这个 |
| 1007 | My husband, Jim, a lot of people know the story | 我丈夫,吉姆,很多人都知道这个故事 |
| 1008 | because it was his restaurant business failing | 因为他的餐馆生意失败了 |
| 1009 | that rocketed us into this personal crisis. | 导致我们陷入个人危机 |
| 1010 | And that's when I invented the five second rule. | 於是发明五二法. |
| 1011 | Well, his best friend and he worked at that restaurant business for seven years. | 他最好的朋友和他在餐厅工作了七年 |
| 1012 | And at the end of the seven years, they sold it for a song to a new investor. | 而在七年末,他们为了一首歌卖给了一位新的投资者. |
| 1013 | And our best friend, his business partner was able to shrug and go, | 我们最好的朋友, 他的生意伙伴 能够缩缩而去, |
| 1014 | OK, well, that's entrepreneurship. | 好吧,这是创业。 |
| 1015 | I'm very proud of what we did. | 我为我们所做的感到非常骄傲。 |
| 1016 | I'm proud of how hard we worked. | 我为我们的辛勤工作感到自豪. |
| 1017 | And, you know, did we return the profit we wanted? | 而且,你知道,我们有没有归还 我们想要的利润? |
| 1018 | No, but I'm still proud of myself. | 不,但我还是为自己骄傲 |
| 1019 | My husband couldn't do that. | 我丈夫不能这么做 |
| 1020 | My husband said, I failed. | 我丈夫说,我失败了。 |
| 1021 | Do you know, for seven years, he has looked in the mirror every morning, Jim, | 你知道吗 七年来 他每天早上都照镜子 吉姆 |
| 1022 | like so many of us do, and dragged his past in there and said, | 就像我们很多人一样 把他的过去拖进去说 |
| 1023 | because this thing in my past, I am a failure. | 因为我的过去,我是个失败者 |
| 1024 | I am unworthy. | 我配不上你们 |
| 1025 | I am unlovable. | 我可不可爱 |
| 1026 | When I first started this high five thing in April of 2020 to pick myself up | 当我在2020年4月 第一次开始这五件大事的时候 |
| 1027 | after getting fired from my dream job as a talk show host | 在做脱口秀节目主持人后被开除 |
| 1028 | and in the throes of the pandemic and my kids in crisis | 和在这场大流行的惨痛 和我的孩子在危机中 |
| 1029 | and the world in crisis and just feeling overwhelmed, | 和处于危机之中的世界, 和感觉不堪重负, |
| 1030 | Chris couldn't do it. | 克里斯不能做到这一点。 |
| 1031 | And the reason why I couldn't do it is the reason why everybody's resistant to doing it. | 我之所以不能这样做 是因为每个人都拒绝这么做 |
| 1032 | It's because he was dragging all of that judgment | 是因为他拖了所有的判决 |
| 1033 | and everything from his past into the bathroom every morning. | 每天早上从他的过去到浴室 |
| 1034 | And he was saying, because of that experience, | 他说,由于这种经历, |
| 1035 | I don't see a human being that's worthy of celebration. | 不见有值得庆贺之人. |
| 1036 | So if you've experienced trauma or abuse or discrimination | 所以,如果你经历过创伤或虐待或歧视 |
| 1037 | or you've been abandoned or, you know, you're a human being | 或者你被抛弃,或者,你知道,你是人 |
| 1038 | and you've done things you've regretted or you wish you could change, | 你做了你后悔的事 或者希望你能改变 |
| 1039 | and you'd forgive Jim or me for it, | 你会原谅吉姆或我, |
| 1040 | but you stand in judgment of yourself, you will resist this | 但你要为自己着想 你会抗拒的 |
| 1041 | because right now you see a human being who doesn't deserve celebration. | 因为现在你看到一个不值得庆祝的人 |
| 1042 | If you're like Jim and I and you are very much achievement driven, | 如果你像我和吉姆一样 并且你非常有成就感 |
| 1043 | you may realize as you resist this that you don't celebrate yourself | 你可能意识到,当你抗拒这一点, 你不庆祝自己 |
| 1044 | unless you've done something, unless you've worked out, | 除非你已经做了些什么, 除非你已经工作了, |
| 1045 | unless you've got the money in the bank, | 除非你有银行的钱, |
| 1046 | unless you're driving the Range Rover, | 除非你在驾驶狂野车 |
| 1047 | unless you fix that thing. | 除非你修好那个 |
| 1048 | And what I'm here to tell you is we got it all opposite, Jim. | 我在这里要告诉你的是 我们得到了这一切相反,吉姆。 |
| 1049 | You see, we've been withholding the very support and celebration that we need | 你看,我们一直在拒绝 我们所需要的支持和庆祝 |
| 1050 | in order to feel inspired, encouraged and motivated | 激励、鼓励和激励 |
| 1051 | to take the actions that change our life. | 采取改变我们生活的行动。 |
| 1052 | When you talk about personality, so extroverts, introverts, | 当你谈论个性, 所以外向,内向, |
| 1053 | a lot of us really, I know I did this, | 我们很多人真的, 我知道我这样做, |
| 1054 | I was all wrong about what confidence meant. | 我完全错了 信心意味着什么。 |
| 1055 | I thought confidence was a personality trait. | 我以为自信是个性特质 |
| 1056 | I love this. | 我喜欢这个 |
| 1057 | Tell me more. | 告诉我更多。 |
| 1058 | I thought that people that are outgoing are the confident ones, right? | 我以为退出的人是自信的人,对吧? |
| 1059 | And the truth is, confidence is not a personality trait at all. | 事实上,自信根本不是一个个性特征。 |
| 1060 | It's a skill. | 师作么生. |
| 1061 | And a lot of the extroverted people that you know are actually very insecure. | 很多被夸张的人,你知道 他们实际上非常不安全。 |
| 1062 | I used to be one of them. | 我曾经是其中之一。 |
| 1063 | I used to be the kind of bossy, crass, loudmouth | 我曾经是那种狂妄,粗鲁,大声的嘴 |
| 1064 | that didn't believe in myself, that didn't believe in my ideas, | 不相信自己, 不相信我的想法, |
| 1065 | that didn't have the confidence and the courage to really be the real me. | 没有自信和勇气成为真正的我 |
| 1066 | To I am who I'm not flaws in all. | 对我而言,我不是所有缺陷 |
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